07/08/2012 09:55 BST | Updated 07/08/2012 09:55 BST

Olympic Village Rife With Regimented, Goal-Based Sex

Olympic athletes are engaged in lots of sex, which they see as some sort of physical endurance challenge.

The gathering of 10,000 young, fit, unfeasibly highly-motivated freaks in an enclosed space has fuelled intense media speculation about whether they have genitals.