Today I was given a very loud and clear message. I was driving along thinking of all the things that could have been but never were. I thought briefly about something that had it happened I believed would have been an error of judgement on my part. Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted, no, they were overdubbed by an intrusion. The intrusion (of unknown source as I was alone) quite loudly and clearly stated:
There are no mistakes.
Wow. I have most definitely been told. Whilst I often chatter away to guides, spirit and angels, and my life is full of signs, intuitions and messages, I have never quite been shouted at in that manner. I guess somebody felt it was important that I heard that and took it on board!
I do love that philosophy. There are no mistakes.
Well that is a relief! This feeds wonderfully into the belief that everything happens for a reason and that all things good, bad and indifferent serve a purpose in our personal and spiritual growth.
The fact that there are no mistakes can be a hard one to fathom, particularly if you are in the midst of feeling regret, guilt or sorrowful for some past action. I am sure there have been times in your life where you have held your head in your hands and cursed your name for something that you have said or done.
In living by the mantra that nothing is a mistake, we do not vindicate ourselves from responsibility, but instead we can intelligently seek out the meaning behind our actions and their repercussions. No matter how misguided they may seem, or how much regret we feel, we may utilize our mistakes as a valuable opportunity. Mistakes are simply fresh chances for us to learn.
Do not misunderstand me. Regret is a real thing. Regret is a struggle and a torture that can summon up a lifetime of misery. If only...? What if...? Perhaps if I had...? Regret is real, because like so many other human thoughts, we attach ourselves to it, we make it a part of our persona and we exhaust ourselves mentally by almost becoming it. But whilst it is real, it is also not real. It is a perspective. Perspective can be shifted.
Living under a banner of 'enlightenment seeker' means we are duty bound to shift our perspective. We must take those regrets and alleged mistakes and change them into something else, something more positive. This is true for all negative emotions; fear, sadness, pain, anger, stress, despair, depression and delusion.
We must realize that these negative thoughts and their associated emotions result from our own minds. No matter what terrible choices we have made, or what horrible events have befallen us, we have the choice to grieve for these for the rest of our time here. Or, alternatively we must find a way to cope.
And in my mind, the best way to cope is to turn a tragedy into a full-scale personal revolution that leads us straight up to our personal heaven's door.
Regret can be a huge burden on your soul. I suggest you make efforts from this day forward to live differently with your regret and your mistakes. Try to see the value in them, try to see the learning that you can achieve and then release the emotion that makes you feel bad about yourself. But first this...
Take a piece of paper. Write on it everything you regret, everything you think you could have done better or differently.
Then write down your emotions about this, how it makes you feel about yourself and the other people involved. Take this piece of paper, find a fireproof pot, go outside and burn that piece of paper.
Maybe sit and meditate on this for a few minutes, mull it over with a cup of tea. Allow the relief and the joy to replace any old, worn, tired feelings of regret that you hold. You are now free.
You have a fresh slate, one that you can base your spirituality and your life upon. From now on look at your life through the eyes of a person determined to learn. Become a master of your existence and remember this always... There Are No Mistakes.
An excerpt from The High Heeled Guide to Spiritual Living by Alice Grist