When it comes to flattering women, some men are plain clueless.
To rectify the matter, women have been sharing some of the “compliments” they regularly receive that may be well-meaning, but are actually seriously insulting.
Guys, listen and learn.
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1. “Any compliment that follows the ‘you sure are x for a y’. Such as, ‘you sure are pretty for a woman your age’, or ‘you sure are smart for a girl.’ Just bad form all round.
3. “Men who feel the need to point out how big my tits are. A guy that I saw around campus DMed (direct messaged) me on Instagram and said: ‘Just thought you should know, you have some really big boobs.’ No shit, they aren’t on my chest or anything.”
5. “I’m a redhead. Really sick of guys telling me they’re ‘super into redheads’ or ‘I only date redheads’. Way to make me feel like that’s the only thing that matters about me for you.”
6. “’You’re hot for an Asian’ and ‘I’ve always wanted to get with an Asian’. 1) Didn’t know Asians were universally ugly and that I’m an exception. 2) Thanks for reducing me to a check mark on your bucket list.”
8. “I’ve had guys tell me they wanted to date me because I’m ‘not like other girls’. I understand their intent was that they think I have a unique personality and that’s cool. But saying they want to be with me because I’m ‘not like other girls’ feels a lot like they just don’t enjoy hanging out with women in general, and it makes me wonder why they’ve written off an entire gender as people they don’t particularly find interesting or fun to be around.”
9. “After a woman does something really badass or something that demonstrates how smart she is...don’t immediately complement her looks, it’s not as nice as you may mean it to be.”
10. “Anything to do with my weight. Got diagnosed with celiac earlier this year and I lost a ton of weight. I was just blown away by how many men I knew told me how great I looked suddenly when I was quite literally starving and malnourished.”
WHO: Actress Kim Cattrall DATE: "I went out with an actor who said he'd come to see me in the play I was in and then we'd go out afterward for a drink or dinner. Then he called to downgrade it to nothing after, just him coming to my performance. He showed up at intermission." Kim Cattrall attends the Broadway opening night of 'Seminar' at The Golden Theatre. (credit:Getty)
Michael Kors (02 of12)
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WHO: Fashion designer Michael Kors DATE: "In my twenties, I went to meet my date at a really chic, fashionable restaurant. I wasn't dressed up necessarily, but I had one a nice shirt and jeans. My date showed up in cutoffs and a tank top. I knew half the people in the restaurant, who were all looking at me like 'Who is this guy with Michael Kors?' It was so embarrassing. My tip: Always have your first date at a casual place." Designer Michael Kors attends the 2012 Human Rights Campaign Gala. (credit:Getty)
Iman's Tip On How To Avoid Bad Dates (03 of12)
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WHO: Model Iman DATE:"I moved to the U.S at 18 to model and I thought going out with a stranger alone was a strange concept, so I would always bring along a friend on my first dates. No man ever complained about it, though, because the friend I'd bring along would always be another model." Model Iman speaks at the 2011 Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater. (credit:Getty)
Lauren Conrad(04 of12)
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WHO: Fashion designer and blogger Lauren Conrad DATE: "I've been on a lot more bad first dates than good ones -- there's been so many. For one, my mother set me up, which should have been a red flag. He and I didn't talk for the majority of the date -- we just sat there in awkward silence. I ate as quickly as I could to speed up getting out of there." TV personality Lauren Conrad arrives at 13th Annual Warner Bros. And InStyle Golden Globe Awards After Party (credit:Getty)
Kelly Rowland (05 of12)
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WHO: Singer Kelly Rowland DATE:"I fell asleep on his shoulder, and I slobbered and snored. That was pretty bad. But he shouldn't have take men to see "There's Something About Mary" for my third time. Whoopsie." Singer Kelly Rowland arrives at the 54th Annual GRAMMY Awards held at Staples Center. (credit:Getty)
Andie MacDowell (06 of12)
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WHO: Actress Andie MacDowell DATE: "It's very odd to start dating after being married for a long time and this was one of my first dates since the divorce with my husband. My date might have only been six or seven years older than me, but my kids see me as very youthful. He came to the door to take me out. My daughter was teeny tiny at the time, and she announced, 'Mom, he is too old for you' right in front of him." Actress Andie MacDowell attends the 'Captive' Premiere during day four of the 62nd Berlin International Film Festival. (credit:Getty)
Tommy Hilfiger (07 of12)
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WHO: Designer Tommy Hilfiger DATE: "I was having dinner with a girl in a restaurant, and I was so incredibly bored -- I had to get out. So I told her I had a business meeting I'd forgotten about and had to leave right then. I certainly don't think she bought it -- luckly I never talked to her again." Tommy Hilfiger prepares backstage at the Tommy Hilfiger Men's Fall 2012 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week. (credit:Getty)
Jessie J (08 of12)
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WHO: Singer Jessie J DATE: "I went bowling on a double date...I got excited and I accidentally threw the ball the wrong way -- backward. It was so embarrassing. They were like,'Yeah, she's so uncool.'" Jessie J arrives at the 54th Annual GRAMMY Awards held at Staples Center. (credit:Getty)
Eliza Doolittle(09 of12)
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WHO: Singer Eliza Doolittle DATE: "I went on a blind date, and after that I never, ever did it again. The guy repeated everything he said twice. He'd say, 'So, how are you? How are you?' and I'd say I was fine, and he'd say, 'Good, good.' Or 'I'll have the mac and cheese please, please. Yeah, the mac and cheese' I don't know if there was something actually wrong with him or if it was just a bad habit, but no more blind dates after that." Eliza Doolittle attends The Peace One Day Celebration 2011. (credit:Getty)
Salma Hayek (10 of12)
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WHO: Actress Salma Hayek DATE: "My first date with my husband started badly. I didn't know it was a date. I thought I was going to an event, and then there was just one person at it. I was set up by friends to think I was going to an event, because they knew I wouldn't go on a date. I was angry. And he didn't know, because he thought I knew he was coming just to meet him. It started out really badly. But as you can see, it ended happy." Salma Hayek arrives at the 69th Annual Golden Globe Awards. (credit:Getty)
Bear Grylls(11 of12)
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WHO: Adventurer Bear Grylls DATE: "I made a picnic up on a mountain for a girl, with tables and chairs and three courses. It took me a full day to carry it all up there. But then she never showed, and the wind and rain blew it. The whole night was a washout." Bear Grylls attends the 2012 Laureus World Sports Awards. (credit:Getty)
Wendy Williams On Breaking Dates (12 of12)
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WHO: Media personality Wendy Williams DATE: "I was a smart dating girl. I always had enough money for a cab from wherever I was. I didn't have problems breaking a date. Like I'd say, 'You know what, this date is really not working out. Don't worry -- if you don't pick up the tab, I will, and I'll take a cab back to my house.' If you say it like you mean it, the dates can't be bad -- they just end." Wendy Williams attends the 20th Anniversary Celebration Of Christian Louboutin. (credit:Getty)