If we don't publicly talk about boys and men as victims of sexual abuse then we're not providing them with the words that allow them to speak the language and set them free from that darkness. Does not talking mean that we collude with the silence, the pain and the suffering? But things are definitely changing for the better.
As a culture we expect our boys to become men without assistance, whereas we could all do with help, guidance and support. These qualities are best imparted by someone who has 'been there and done it', and such mentors can help fathers as well as teens.
If I'm honest, I had initial reservations about reading this book. Was it going to be a misogynistic rant, with hundreds of pages of some bitter bloke whinging and complaining about how unfair life is for men? I was wrong. It is not.
From roast turkey, tins of sweets and mince pies - the temptation for excess of food is irresistible for many. However, for those suffering with anorexia and bulimia, the constant reminders of food can feel like never ending pain and torture. The time to be joyful is anything but that.
I don't think it should surprise anyone that women's pleasure is not top the list when it comes to pornography in the first place- the fact that it is being banned, just further reinforces what we already know: Porn is made for men.
I suspect the reason men do this is very simple: we think we should. Sitting with knees together and legs in tight is a sign of weakness or homosexuality - both social death, of course. So with this overbearing sense of self-consciousness, we have somehow decided that 'legs akimbo' is the norm.
Gender norms are so fixed that we refuse to recognise male victims of sexual violence just as we refuse to identify female perpetrators. As a woman, I was taught from a very early age that men are always after sex, the same way I was taught that sex is not a primary drive for women. Ridiculous as both these statements sound, they're still inscribed on our social psyche.
I remember the excitement I felt seeing that little blue cross in the small square window of my pregnancy test. It seemed surreal. I was 27 years old and pregnant with my first son. I couldn't wait to share the news with my husband but I wanted to find the perfect way to tell him. We both wanted a baby but I sensed that, like many men, he still didn't feel 'ready'.
Developing deep and broader roots help us all to be safer, more stable and resilient. Resilience allows us to cope more effectively with these setbacks, disappointments and disasters. Today's young men need these life skills more than ever before. The world is changing. And not necessarily in a good way for men.
Clearly the basics of what I see a man as are confused. I know what I value in a man, but that is not the same as what I imagine a man to be. Taking my large amount of confusion into account, how on earth must men be feeling?
Men are supposed to take 10 seconds to get ready. Why? Because everything goes together: shirts, jumpers and skinny jeans or chinos - et voila: the professional Scandinavian late-twenties hipster reincarnated.
As a middle-aged man I never felt feminism had anything to do with me. It was the woman's battle for equality. Whilst I may have agreed with their ethos and end goals it was, and always would be their fight. It was only when listening to Emma Watson's amazing speech to the UN that I realised how wrong I was.
I say ending violence against women and girls requires all of us - men and boys, women and girls, governments, communities and activists. I genuinely believe that we have a common goal. And I genuinely believe that we can work together in a way that does not reassert male power over women, that keeps women and girls at the centre, and focuses on transforming gender inequality rather than just adding men and boys.
I sometimes meet some of those that attend these seminars in my psychiatric clinic. I take it seriously because a lot of people think it's a bit of fun and it's not - what it is - is exploitation of people with low self worth and often extreme naivety coupled with the hope that it's the answer to their dreams.
What makes a man? That's probably a question every man has asked themselves at least once or twice. According to the many Hollywood action blockbusters that have graced the silver screen in recent decades, it's your typical testosterone filled alpha male with bulging biceps, bundles of bravado and colossal ego to match.
This International Men's Day, don't take it for a joke, think about the men in our society who face real, life-changing issues every day of their lives and feel they should suffer in silence. They'll be your fathers, brothers, colleagues and best mates, and they need your help.