Single Dad With Aspergers' Poignant Account Of Fatherhood Gives Readers' 'Goosebumps'

Single Dad With Aspergers Writes Poignant Account Of Fatherhood
|

A single dad with Aspergers has given people "goosebumps" by sharing his moving account of becoming a father.

The dad, who hasn't been named, explained the mother of his daughter, Faith, left when she was only one-month-old.

"My princess Faith was left with an idiot (me), I hated who I was and what I had," he wrote in the emotive post.

"My parents told me to give her up for adoption but thinking about it, laying there on the sofa alone holding Faith, in my arms she looked me in the eye and grabbed my little finger, barely able to grab the whole thing - 'I'll never let you go' I said."

The dad shared his experience on the Love What Matters Facebook page on 21 January.

In the moving account, the dad explained he has struggled with emotion, friendships and relationships all his life because he has Aspergers syndrome - a form of autism, which affects how a person makes sense of the world, processes information and relates to other people.

But the dad said having his daughter completely changed him.

"Faith was the first and only time I understood what love was. I remember the pregnancy, it was the bump, just a bump on my then girlfriend's body, no more, no less," he wrote.

"'Cold' you're probably thinking, but as the saying goes 'if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound?' You haven't heard the sound, I didn't see a baby."

The dad then went into detail about the day his daughter was born.

He said during the 14 hours of labour, his senses were "about to explode".

"Screaming, bright hospital lights, nurses speaking what sounded like a foreign language, the smell of the hospital making me sick, there wasn't a detail I couldn't see or missed," he wrote.

"The nurses revealed from underneath the bloodied blanket this baby. Nothing else existed and in what seemed like slow motion this beautiful baby appeared into the world.

"Holding her, all negativity dropped from my body. For one of the very few moments in my life my brain just stopped and I couldn't stop staring... she was mine.

"I made her and from that moment I was suddenly refilled with excitement, love, hope. I WAS A DADDY! I was the proudest man on earth."

The dad explained a month after the birth, he found out his girlfriend had been cheating on him with his best friend.

She said she was leaving him, and leaving their daughter Faith too.

He was encouraged to give Faith up for adoption, but instead he left his job to care for her full-time.

"I was going to do this," he wrote. "Me and Faith against the world.

"And we did and it was hard. The crying was unbearable, my sensory issues were always on edge, my depression worsened.

"I didn't sleep or eat - my sole purpose was to look after this girl. She was depending on me.

"There were times I'd scream after putting her to bed. I'd lock myself in the bathroom and cry fully clothed in the bath tub until I fell asleep."

He explained that having Aspergers usually means he needs time out on a regular basis - something he couldn't do with a newborn baby.

But he used logic - what he called his biggest ally - to his advantage, because babies love routine.

"Over time it got easier and it went from being scary to having a best friend," he wrote.

"I may never be a perfect dad but I try perfectly hard and I love her truly and she loves me... Faith taught me unconditional love.

"This girl will depend on me forever. I got my jobs back. I went to University whilst she was in nursery. Things only got better."

The Facebook post racked up nearly 25,000 likes and was shared 6,000 times in 20 hours.

People commenting on the post praised the dad for not only sharing his story, but sticking with his daughter and becoming an amazing father.

One person wrote: "You sir, are by far a great man and I salute you. What a great job you have done in teaching her [Faith] how to be a man and what a man does."

A woman commented: "*Goosebumps* that right there, that is what it's all about... bravo", to which another woman replied: "Exactly what you said."

Celebrity Single Parents
Charlize Theron(01 of11)
Open Image Modal
In 2012, Charlize Theron announced that she adopted a baby boy named Jackson. Later that year, she told British Vogue, “I've always been very honest in saying I wanted a family.”In August 2015, the 39-year-old star then adopted a second child and named her August. Along with being vocal about wanting a family, Theron has also openly said that marriage was “never something that was important [to me].” (credit:Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP)
Diane Keaton(02 of11)
Open Image Modal
Academy Award-winning actress Diane Keaton adopted her two kids when she was in her 50s. In 1996, she adopted her daughter Dexter, and in 2001 she adopted her son Duke. In 2012, Keaton talked about being a single mom and said: “The loves of my life are my children and my mother. I don’t feel as if I need a man. Don’t get me wrong, I love men ... [but] I have kids and my work. That’s fine with me.” (credit:Getty)
Sandra Bullock(03 of11)
Open Image Modal
When Sandra Bullock was famously married to Jesse James, the two began the process of adopting a boy named Louis. However, after news broke that James had been cheating on his wife of five years, the two divorced in 2010.Bullock then went on to adopt her Louis on her own. (credit:Barry King via Getty Images)
January Jones(04 of11)
Open Image Modal
“Mad Men” alum January Jones is a single mom to a 4-year-old boy named Xander. The 37-year-old actress has never revealed who the boy’s father is. (credit:Paul A. Hebert/Invision/AP)
Lucy Liu(05 of11)
Open Image Modal
Lucy Liu surprised us all when she announced the birth of her son in August 2015. The actress’ rep told Us Weekly that Rockwell Lloyd Liu was “brought into the world via gestational carrier.” Liu is now a single mom and couldn’t be happier. Speaking to Today.com, the “Elementary” star said, “Every day is just a miracle and a dream. Because everything is so different every day. You're not even thinking about ‘Is it Monday or Tuesday?’ or ‘What time it is?’ any more, you're just thinking about how he's changed from minute to minute and his reactions — also how you are and how you grow as a human being, being around another human being, like that.” (credit:Greg Allen/Invision/AP)
Angelina Jolie(06 of11)
Open Image Modal
Before Angelina Jolie got together with Brad Pitt, she adopted her son Maddox as a single parent. Describing her decision to adopt, Jolie once said: “I knew once I committed to Maddox, I would never be self-destructive again.”The 40-year-old actress adopted her son from Cambodia in 2002. Three years later, she adopted her second child, Zahara. Around that time, Jolie began dating Pitt and soon after he adopted both her kids as his own. Today, the couple is married with six children: Maddox, 14, Pax, 11, Zahara, 10, Shiloh, 9, and twins Vivienne and Knox, 7. (credit:Jason LaVeris via Getty Images)
Meg Ryan(07 of11)
Open Image Modal
Meg Ryan had her son Jack during her marriage to Dennis Quaid in 1992. After the couple divorced, Ryan decided she wanted another child and adopted a girl named Daisy on her own in 2006. At the time, her son was already 14 years old. Following Daisy’s adoption, Ryan admitted she loves being a single mom. “Jack has his dad and they’re close, he’ll always have that. But when you’re the only one in the house with the kids, you get to be the one in charge,” she said. “You’re the one making the rules. There’s no stress because you and some other adult don’t agree on how you want to raise your kids.” (credit:ASSOCIATED PRESS)
Perez Hilton(08 of11)
Open Image Modal
In 2013, Perez Hilton became a first-time father. Mario Armando Lavandeira III was born via surrogate and is Hilton’s biological child.Two years later, the 37-year-old celebrity blogger welcomed his second child, Mia Alma, via surrogate. (credit:Walter McBride via Getty Images)
Kristin Davis(09 of11)
Open Image Modal
The former “Sex and the City” star adopted a daughter on her own in 2011. She named her Gemma Rose.After welcoming Gemma into her home, Davis revealed that she had always thought about adoption. “I had always thought in the back of my head that I would adopt — that it was a possibility,” she said. “So I started the process … but it’s quite confusing. There are all these different rules and if you’re single it’s harder.” (credit:John Salangsang/Invision/AP)
Sheryl Crow(10 of11)
Open Image Modal
The 53-year-old singer adopted her two sons as a single parent. Her first son Wyatt was adopted in 2007 and her second son Levi was adopted in 2010. (credit:Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)
Ricky Martin(11 of11)
Open Image Modal
In 2008, Ricky Martin welcomed his twins, Matteo and Valentino, via surrogate. Following their birth, the first-time father said: “Everything they do, from smiling to crying, feels like a blessing. Being a father feels amazing. This has been the most spiritual moment in my life.” (credit:Alexander Tamargo via Getty Images)