01/12/2011 17:17 GMT | Updated 31/01/2012 05:12 GMT

Lipgoss: Why Famous People Look Hotter

Wasting our life on pop culture blogs and gossip sites, so you don't have to

It's a law of physics that becoming famous makes you at least 35% more attractive than you were as a civilian. In some cases, the hotness quotient increases by a whopping 70%. Just check out these pictures of the Mad Men cast before the producers and attendant personal trainers, stylists and make-up artists got their greedy mitts on them.

See? It's as if they've all been sprinkled with magic sparkledust by the Fame Fairy. In fact, it's Creme De La Mer, Atkins and Vita Liberata faketan. And, while we're at it, Santa isn't real. That fat guy was your mum's lover.

Of all the celebrity transformations we have witnessed, the most eye-popping has got to be Victoria Adams' metamorphosis into Posh Spice, and then into one half (figuratively speaking, that is; physically she makes up one-third) of Brand Beckham. Check out these amazing vintage snaps of a 17-year old Vicky Adams.

As you can see, the principal strategy in her fame-over was to get browner and skinnier and friendlier with a surgeon. Which, sadly, tends to work. But we bet she was a lot more fun back in the day of these pics....

Knife Crime, LA Style

As I've discussed in previous blogposts, a pregnancy rumour is a GREAT rumour. However, a plastic surgery rumour comes a close second. And this week it's the turn of Ali Lohan, Lindsay's little sis, to loudly deny that she's had some work done.

Unfortunately, she issues her denial on the following grounds, "Because, like, when would I do that? I'm 17 years old. That's not even legal! I would need my mother's signature, and do you think my mom would sign off on that?" Erm, yep. After reading stuff like this, we do.

Bad Romance

What is love? Well, the choice is yours, because we've got two different definitions of romance on the internet this week. On our left, we've got Robert Pattinson saying that he'd like, totally die for love. Cue a zillion teenage girls swooning, then getting up again and texting their boyfriend demanding, "Wd u die fr me or nt?"

To our right, we've got Lady Gaga arguing that love is dead, announcing, "I have an inability to know what happiness feels like with a man," even though the internet is pretty convinced she's got a boyfriend, Taylor Kinney of The Vampire Diaries. Roman-tick.