33 Too-Real Tweets About Life With A 'Threenager'

"The light at the end of the terrible two tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train called the threenager."

The “terrible twos” got nothin’ on life with a “threenager” ― or so parents of 3-year-olds would have you believe.

It may seem surprising that someone so small could pack so much attitude, but threenagers prove it’s possible with their angst and emotional volatility. For parents dealing with this phase, Twitter offers a welcome escape.

Below, we’ve rounded up 33 relatable tweets about parenting threenagers.

“I’m not a threenager,” my three-year old son screams at the top of his lungs, during a threenager fit.

— Jake Sherman (@JakeSherman) November 19, 2020

The threenager just asserted her dominance by stuffing an entire pizza crust in her mouth as I reached for it and then walked to the trash and spit it out.

Maintaining eye contact the entire time.

— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) May 15, 2019

Parents everywhere: The Terrible Twos are so rough.

Threenagers: Hold my juice.

— let me momsplain (@letmemomsplain) June 30, 2020

1 way u know u have a #threenager? He's looking at the empty mailbox & screaming bec there's no mail in it & it's not even your mailbox.

— Toulouse and Tonic (@toulouseNtonic) April 21, 2015

Every night I make dinner and every night my threenager won't eat it in the most mundane and wasteful battle of wits ever recorded

— ~*Wellness Witchery*~ (@TheMandiEm) February 1, 2018

To every parent I chuckled at when they used the word “threenager.”

I’m sorry.

I get it now.

— Eric Smith (@ericsmithrocks) October 4, 2020

1. Look them directly in the eyes
2. Don’t back down
3. Don’t make any sudden movements
4. Speak with authority
5. If all else fails, throw snacks to them

Me, explaining how to survive a threenager

— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) April 16, 2019

My threenager caused me to put myself in time out for a cry during dinner today 🤪

— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 6, 2020

When people say you’re gonna have a “threenager” when your kid turns three yrs old they aren’t lying. My son just saw that i had cheez-its in the pantry so he goes “oh my gosh are you kidding me? these are for me?” 😂

— Tiara Simone 🦋 (@artbytiara) January 21, 2019

My 3yo is crying because she asked me to draw a happy face and I had the AUDACITY to give it eyes AND a mouth.#momlife #threenagers

— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) August 29, 2018

Dressed up as an exhausted mom of 4 today. I went all out. I even had a threenager following me around screaming for more candy.

— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) November 1, 2018

Establish dominance over your threenager by getting her a bagel from the not as good place.

— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) August 28, 2019

It's 3 o'clock, do you know where your scissors are? Ugh. #threenager pic.twitter.com/52xp0CjXxK

— Christina Evans (@cakevans) January 22, 2017

You know that cute game where you say no and your threenager screams and then a helpful stranger says, “Just wait until they’re a teenager.”

And it is helpful because now your anger is aimed at the helpful stranger and not your kid.

— Molly England (@bluebonetbabies) May 26, 2018

The light at the end of the terrible two tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train called the threenager.

— Parentalgrit (@ParentalGrit) September 13, 2018

Threenager: (noun)

A three year old with all the emotional instability from the terrible twos but with more of a vocabulary, mixed with the rebellious attitude of a teenager.

— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) May 21, 2019

Terrible twos is LIGHT work compared to having a threenager. The term terrible twos is an actual set up, you know. Three? Way tougher.

— Mattie James (@themattiejames) September 29, 2017

My 3yo is crying because I won't take her to get her picture taken with Santa.

Today.

In August.#momlife #threenagers

— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) August 24, 2018

Our little guy turned 3 yesterday.

He also escaped his crib 17 times, threw 143 tantrums, and broke a snow globe, causing water to soak the pages of a favorite book.

I’m glad the “terrible twos” are over.

But this “threenager” stuff is going to kill me!#ToddlerForSale

— Richard Dean (@dad_on_my_feet) March 18, 2019

If there's ever a moment of silence in your car, you are destined to blow it by pointing at something your threenager will somehow not see.

— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) July 18, 2020

G is whining because I won't turn out all the lights.

The light he's referring to is the sun.

Toddlers are fun.#THREEnager #momlife

— Becky The Most Annoying Mom (@beckyhas4kids) December 27, 2018

Created a “Zen Zone” for my girl to help us manage this “threenage” attitude & all the emotions that come along with it! 😩It was either this or one of us was gone have to move out ! 🗣🤣 Glad we went with the latter😌 #SocialEmotionalHealthInKidsMatters #PositiveDiscipline pic.twitter.com/zQLjDchMdu

— lady bridgerton (@amorDOUXshanola) March 23, 2021

My threenager has notified me that I’m no longer allowed to sing in the car.

She did this by silently glaring at me with her arms folded.

She has got this passive aggressive thing down.

— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) April 9, 2019

Lil: "You're crazy! You're making me crazy! You're totally crazy!"

So this is why they call them "threenagers."

— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) May 25, 2015

I'm having a Malibu and diet coke. So that should let you know how life with the threenager is going...

— Julia Sugarbaker is speaking (@JDSugarbaker) February 28, 2015

Threenager is an actual thing, you know. pic.twitter.com/NToqyB5dUA

— Hannah Michalak (@HannahMaggs22) April 1, 2017

My 3 year old told me she loved me but doesn’t like me and I honestly knew this was coming but did not think it would happen until she was a teenager.

I’m not sure whether to be frightened or impressed with her ability to distinguish between the two. #threenager

— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) June 10, 2019

The problem isn't the terrible twos or the threenager or the fournado, it's whatever age they decide they no longer need naps

— RubMor (@QBruby) January 18, 2021

If you don’t put your shoes on before your pants and then scream about it for 37 minutes, are you even a threenager?

— Bbeca - (Buh-becca) (@SaintFreckles87) June 9, 2019

Watching a threenager for two hours is like watching a theatre production of Die Hard.

— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) July 19, 2020

The threenager attitude is REAL you guys. It’s dangerous. I repeat, it. Is. Dangerous. 😂😂😭

— Probably know me as MarijuMama (@sarahbellamarie) April 7, 2020

3 yr old: “I stay in my big boy bed tonight, mommy, I promise.”

3 am in my bed every night: #threenager pic.twitter.com/rmH3lwRbr1

— Jamie Coleman, MD FACS (@JJcolemanMD) January 25, 2020

Can we stop with the “terrible twos” and “threenagers” and “FML fours” and just admit that kids are dicks until they move out?

— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) March 15, 2021

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