Politics is a tough ol’ game. Long hours, a never-ending workload and the constant scrutiny of the public and media.
Throw Brexit, the greatest political upheaval in generations, into the mix and it’s perhaps no surprise that some of those who have the biggest vested in the process are beginning to show signs of... well, we’re not quite sure what.
Take the Foreign Secretary for example – constant negotiations with his counterparts across the globe have left him so in need of a nap he’s started measuring time in bear sleeps.
And who could forget Andrew Bridgen’s attempt to look natural at work by creating a staged photo so unnatural and tense you can almost taste the nervous sweat on the back of his neck.
There are of course, a number of issues that need to be raised here.
Bridgen recently had to deny he was the backbencher who said Theresa May would soon get a knife “stuck in her front”.
An unnamed Tory MP told The Sunday Times: “The moment is coming when the knife gets heated, stuck in her front and twisted. She’ll be dead soon.”
Bridgen, an ardent Brexiteer, told BBC Radio 4′s Today programme: “It’s not me, I have no idea who it was I don’t normally hide behind anonymous quotes.”
No list of dotty Tories would be complete without BoJo, so here’s a tweet encapsulating just how wrong someone can be about a work colleague.
Oh, apologies – not that one, this one.
Get your Spitfire at the ready, Andrea Jenkyns is ready for battle.
As Chris Addison helpfully translated:
It should be noted that the only thing Jenkyns has been fighting with so far has been her own boss – this week she came out and said Theresa May could be replaced within two weeks, presumably much to the chagrin of the PM.
Jeremy Hunt Part II
Hunt again. Not even going to attempt to explain what is going on here. They might be still there for all we know, eaten alive by tired bears.
There are a few things that need to be addressed in Peter Bone’s 2016 Brexit Christmas Card:
- 2017 isn’t “post-Brexit”
- is that his dog?
- if it is, is it actually called Brexit?
- why is he fiddling Brexit out of presents to increase the size of his tie collection?
Fast-forward to 2018 and Bone appears to have run out of festive Brexit cheer.
Johnny Mercer was in Devon in February “rallying the troops”.
Also, Johnny Mercer was in Devon in February speaking to an apparently empty room.
Mercer also went viral earlier this month when he tweeted this for absolutely no discernible reason whatsoever.
Anyway, the country is clearly in good hands, good luck everyone!