THE BLOG
01/04/2018 18:59 BST | Updated 01/04/2018 18:59 BST

In Light Of Transgender Day Of Visibility: Can You See Me Now?

I still have to face being told my gender isn't real, or I have to choose one way or the other

Saturday was Transgender Day Of Visibility. It happens every year. It was trans day of visibility 365 days ago... so can you now see me?

I am trans. I am proud. I am visible. I exist. You may deny it, many do. Yet I wake up in the morning and my substantial hands make breakfast. My feet hit the pedals and I drive a car. I’m heard when I speak to people. I exist. I’m seen, in some ways. 

And yes, I don’t doubt that on Saturday plenty of cis people turned to their friends and proclaim “why do they need a day of visibility? We have equal marriage, what else do they want?”

I’ll tell you what. I want to be able to choose my actual gender on a form, not the next closest thing. I want trans people to have access to the support and treatment that they need, without years of waiting. I want all genders to be visible in all areas of life. 

It doesn’t seem much to ask, really it is just a bit of humanity. To recognise that every human is equal in their value, not worth more or less based on their gender identity or sexuality or race or class status or age. 

Trans is not a “look” or a “phase”. Trans people may look like you expect them too, they may not. Trans is not something that will go away if you ignore it. Trans doesn’t always look the same - some come out as kids, others when they’re 60. Trans people might be straight, or gay, or bisexual, or asexual or pansexual. 

In the last year, since trans day of visibility 2017, have I become more visible? No, I don’t think so. I am still married as a “wife” not a spouse or partner. My passport has the wrong gender with no option to correct it. My driving licence is the same. I still have to face being told my gender isn’t real, or I have to choose one way or the other. 

I am trans. I am non binary. I am they/them. I am a partner. I am a person. I am real. Can you see me now?