Unsatisfied with the classic ready salted or cheese and onion crisp flavours? Well, crisp makers have pushed the boat out this year to bring you some much-needed festive cheer in the form of holly jolly flavour editions.
A stroke of culinary Christmas genius? Or taking it that one step too far with something absolutely no one asked for? I can’t quite decide.
Either way, I wanted to try them out – all of them. I taste tested seven different Christmas crisp flavours – so, buckle up as ’tis the season for snacking.
Here’s the ranking, from worst to best.
M&S Collection Pigs In Blankets
Pigs in blankets are arguably the best item on the Christmas dinner table (even the veggie and vegan ones). What I look for in a pig in blanket is a meaty sausage wrapped in smoky, crispy bacon that’s lightly charred from the oven’s flames – but what I get from these crisps is nothing but pure sadness. They’re far too sweet – to the point your teeth hurt and your poor tastebuds are obliterated. In my opinion, crisps should always be savoury or delicately paired with something sweet for balance and this bag is true far cry. These aren’t just any crisps, they’re M&S crisps – and they should be banned immediately.
Rating: 3/10
Available in M&S stores and online at Ocado at £1.75 each for 100g.
Kettle Christmas Truffled Cheese And Sparkling Wine
These crisps come with a big hit of cheese that’ll smack you in the face – and a delicate hint of sparkling wine. There’s an actual sparkling, tingling sensation, which I must admit, I’m not the biggest fan of. And, of course, there’s no getting away from the truffle. Sadly, the truffle flavour is too overpowering and there’s something about the balance in this combination that seems slightly off. But if you’re big into truffle, ignore everything I’ve said so far and dig right in, you’ll probably love them.
Rating: 5/10
Available at Tesco, Asda, Sainsbury’s, Morrisons and Co-Op stores at £1.99 each for 135g.
Tesco Sausage Roll Puffs
Wait, since when has sausage rolls been considered ‘Christmas’? Am I missing out on something? Anyway, I digress. Instead of being fried, these are baked for a light crunch that melts on the tongue. Think of them as a moreish sausage version of a Wotsit, minus the cheese and more meat. A decent crisp that deserves a seat at the festive snack spread, but flavour-wise there’s room for improvement – it’s slightly lacking that umami oomph and on the underwhelming side.
Rating: 6/10
Available in Tesco stores and online at £1 each for 150g bag.
Walkers Sausage Roll
Another sausage roll contender – but these crisps are essentially the smoky bacon Walkers flavour, rebranded and repackaged as a sausage roll; only a touch sweeter with hints of sage, thyme and paprika. They’re both supposed to taste like the same animal, so similarities are to be expected, but jokes on you, brain – these are vegetarian. I feel slightly cheated by this stunt crisp and I thought this British meaty snack had legs to go far in life. But hey, a bonus half point is rewarded for their work to help raise money for The Trussell Trust and support food banks, with 5p from every pack sold being donated.
Rating: 6.5/10
Available in Tesco, Asda, Sainsbury’s, Morrisons and Co-Op stores at 69p each for 32.6g single pack and £1 multipack.
Co-Op Roast Turkey And Stuffing
Want a Christmas dinner without the washing up and expense? Enter: Co-op’s turkey and stuffing flavour crisps, made with British potatoes and a classic turkey, sage, thyme, and onion stuffing flavour seasoning. When you open them up, you’re treated to a lovely turkey gamey aroma. They taste like the real deal –it’s the meaty full-works, trapped inside a humble potato. There’s a delicate saltiness that’ll make your hand automatically gravitate towards the bag for more. Christmas in 2020 isn’t cancelled, it’s found inside this bag and it doesn’t contain any sprouts.
Rating: 7/10
Available in Co-Op stores and online at £1.70 each for 150g.
Waitrose Christmas Iberico Ham And Fig Chutney
Trust Waitrose to come up with the poshest flavour combination ever known to mankind. Despite the boujie ingredients, the iberico ham offers a deep, nutty, aromatic taste. It’s paired alongside a syrupy fig chutney that cuts through the richness with its honey-like sweetness. There’s no overbearing flavours here, a fine balance where one complements the other in perfect harmony. That in itself is no mean feat. Normally, I’d say bulk-buying is wrong during a pandemic, but these unprecedented times call for having a secret snack stash collection when that crunch craving hits.
Rating: 7.5/10
Available in Waitrose stores and online at £2 each for 150g.
Lidl Rosemary And Wild Garlic
For those looking for a new take on the regular cheese and onion, look no further. Sprinkled with woodsy aromatic rosemary bits and soft wild garlic flecks, these crisps have a rich and creamy mouthfeel that’s ridiculously cheesy. So cheesy, in fact, it’s practically a whole cheeseboard packed into a hand-cooked crisp. A worthy addition to any festive snacking table. Try pairing it with your actual Christmas cheeseboard for double dose of Camembert because, why the hell not? It’s 2020 and we deserve it. Just be sure to brush your teeth or chew some gum afterwards because this is some pretty pungent stuff.
Rating: 8/10
Available in Lidl stores at 75p each for 150g bag.