My Husband Hates My Tattoo. The Reason Why Made Me Question How He Sees Our Relationship

“He knew I wanted a sleeve. I’ve been showing him pictures of tattoos for months.”
SrdjanPav via Getty Images

According to a survey by YouGov, a quarter of Brits are inked, and one in nine people have visible tattoos but for some people, they’re still a big turn-off, and this was certainly the case for one Redditor’s husband.

Posting on the /r/relationship_advice subreddit, a 35 year old woman said: “I recently started a traditional [tattoo] sleeve.

“It’s going to be pieced together and I found a really good (male) artist nearby. I don’t know many women in my area who do trad style, I really like his work, and he had availability and great prices so I just went for it.”

If you’re unfamiliar, a ‘sleeve tattoo’ is kind of exactly what it sounds like. It’s a large tattoo or collection of smaller tattoos that covers most or all of a person’s arm.

The Redditor explained that when she had her first appointment, her husband was ‘fine’ but now, not so much.

“He’s upset because I let another man mark me forever before he got to mark me”

The Reddit postersaid: “The artist had missed a spot and had let me know to come in and he would give me a good price on my next one.

“So I sent him a couple of things and made an appointment for two more [tattoos] (my arm felt so incomplete with just one!). My husband knew about this appointment.”

So far, so good, right?

Well, this is where it gets murky.

The day of the tattoo, she invited her husband to come to the appointment and he declined, which she thought nothing of, but then he didn’t speak to her for 24 hours.

Eventually, he spoke.

She explained: “Today he came to me and said he’s upset because I let another man mark me forever before he got to mark me.

“He knew I wanted a sleeve. I’ve been showing him pictures of tattoos for months.”

Now, at this point, you may be wondering as I was, is the husband a tattoo artist himself?

No. He’s not.

She continued: “He knows I have had issues with my body my whole life. He knew I never felt confident enough to be myself and do the things i want to do - and he was happy that I was finally trying to become the person I always wanted to be.

“My insta is literally full of girls working out, traditional tattoos, and girls working out with tattoos. I’ve wanted them for YEARS and I’m finally doing it.”

Finally, in the comments, the Redditor said: “I remember he said that I cheated on him after I came back from the appointment yesterday. ???? For getting tattoos. ???”

In my opinion: throw the whole man out.

What the comments said

The comments were fairly unanimous in saying that this is a misogynist with huge red flags but one summed it up perfectly, saying: ” You’ve received great comments responding to your question, you have done nothing wrong.

I would like you to think about the answer you’d give to 2 questions.

  1. If someone told you that you’re just like your husband - would you take that as a compliment?

  2. Would you like a loved one, someone very important to you, to end up with a person just like your husband?

“I think the answers to these questions might guide you on what you should do further into this relationship.”