Prisoner Pens TripAdvisor-Style Review Of Stay At Perry Barr Station Cell In Birmingham Following Arrest

'I was pleasantly surprised by the cleanliness and decor.'

A prisoner has written a TripAdvisor-style review of his cell after being arrested for criminal damage, including detailing the discovery of a pubic hair with a “ginger hint” which he later concluded was “probably mine”.

West Midlands Police posted a copy of the unnamed arrestee’s review of his stay at the Perry Bar station in Birmingham, which he rated three out of a possible five stars.

The force were quite chuffed with the “praise” it received about the new “state-of-the-art custody suite”.

The 24-year-old detainee was complimentary about not only the facility, but also the efforts of the staff who dealt with him.

The detainee remarked on “how modern and clean the building looks” and the efficiency of staff, saying he was “dealt with promptly by a custody officer and shown to a cell”.

He added: “Once in my cell I was pleasantly surprised by the cleanliness and décor... neutrally decorated to please all parties but done to a high standard.”

Along with concerns about the pubic hair, the detainee also felt cups of tea should been more promptly delivered.

He was also left “heartbroken” by what he thought could have been “something special” developing between himself and a red haired woman on staff.

The detainee noted she referred to everyone as “chic” which made “me blush at first”, before he realised the greeting was not reserved for him alone.

Chief Inspector Paul Minor, West Midlands Police Criminal Justice Manager, told the Birmingham Mail: “We feel it’s a five-star facility. It’s designed to be safer for staff and guests and the more efficient check-in process means we can get arresting officers back out on the streets more quickly.

“The cells have cameras, anti-graffiti surfaces, and reflective ceiling domes so occupants can be seen at all times. It means officers aren’t tied up on cell-door watch so can be out on patrols protecting the public.

“The reviewer has been very complimentary about the facility and staff. But I think he’s been a little harsh by awarding it just a three-star rating.”

The 60-cell custody building opened at the end of May as part of a multi-million pound modernisation project − and followed the launch of its sister suite in Oldbury in March, according to the Mirror.

The post from West Midlands Police sparked some debate on Twitter about just how comfortable a stay detainees should have. One person asked “is it supposed to be a nice experience?”