I've just received the Versace catalogue. Wow, that sexy black punk dress! Opening my emails, for the thirtieth time today, I find yet more suggestions from the likes of Net-a-porter and Moda Operandi advising me what to and what not to wear today. What to wear if I'm a business woman; what to wear if I want to be cool; to be sexy; to be like Cara or Kate; to follow the newest trends in manicures; to repair my skin...
I feel harassed, choked even by the amount of information, the fashion directives being launched at me, all telling me how I should be. I want to find an exit, a door from all of it!
But at the same time I am a woman. A woman with desires, with envies, with dreams, with a hatred of bits of my body, with insecurities, with a fear of being rejected, with a fear of not being 'in the groove.' We all love to dress up, to feel beautiful and we all protect ourselves and project an image with our clothes. But let me out for a second!
I am wearing my comfy clothes today, I love to be like this relaxing at home, but you will never find me out of the house like this, unless a fire alarm is threatening me. So I am the perfect target for these internet aggressors. They know I need to wear clothes that fit my mood and my activities of the day. They should actually send emails about how to cope with the stress of being exposed to so much information and how to navigate temptations, rather than telling me about the latest facials. It's my brain that's going cuckoo, not my skin!
We are creating a world of toxicity. Even the things that are supposed to please us, to lift our mood, are now becoming part of a toxic environment. We are becoming victims of the abundance that is on offer. It feeds our insecurities and shapes our faked dreams. The way fashion is presented to us is infatuating! It creates a need in us, an un-fillable vacuum. We are told what's cool and we want to fit in. We all want to feel part of 'now' of something bigger and cooler than us, but what's "on trend" of course changes all the time. Social media tells us which models or designers are 'in' so we 'follow', always trying to keep ahead of the curve.
Before the internet we had to go out shopping - now shopping has come into our home. It's intrusive and addictive and eats away at our time. When you have sneaked into the tenth net-a-porter email of the week, swearing you just want to have a one second peek, it usually ends up as a 15 minute browse. And still, you are not done with the invader and social media is there, always plugging the newest things. If you live in a big city, the "fashion week" syndrome is becoming a major part of social life. Last year I was in New York during fashion week for a recording. All the taxi drivers were saying goodbye and "have a good fashion week" just like they would have once said 'Merry Christmas'.
What can we do? Close our eyes? Turn off our computers? Evidently no. We need to learn how to stop ourselves identifying and buying in to this tempting, invasive over-consumptive society. We need to re-focus on what we are inside, rather than what we wear outside. Inside is a beautiful and creative soul and the focus on our outer- appearance is too prevalent. It is given too much weight. We are letting fashion dictate and we are letting it predominate. Fashion is a wonderful way to play but it cannot replace the inner guidance that defines our true self.
We need to un-subscribe!
We want to be informed, know about all the trends and at the same time we are feeling overwhelmed. The world of internet was thrown to us too rapidly. We were not ready, we were untrained for it. We are allowing it into our lives without knowing the safe boundaries for our selves. We are realising we want it and we cannot live without information today but at the same time we are not able to maintain a good balance for ourselves. Our day-to-day life is now regimented and rhymed by our emailing life. And at the same time that is how the world is entering the intimate world of our own sphere. This new world where we live requires us to be disciplined and follow our true goals and purposes.