This morning we were strangers. We were both racing around trying to keep up with the fast flowing river that comes with being a mum. We knew nothing of each others lives until we met this evening as our children took part in their karate class. I saw that you were struggling in a way that only mums understand. I came over to say hi and you asked me how many children I had. When I told you 'four' you looked at me with tears in your eyes saying 'how do you do it with four when I can't even do it with two?'
You had had a hard day. You had probably had a hard week, maybe even a hard year.
You poured your heart out to me in just five minutes telling me how stressful your life was. You had to balance the pressures of taking your children to school and nursery, going to work, picking the children up, running the house and taking your children to clubs.
I felt like you had the weight of the world on your shoulders and I just wanted to tell you that everything would be ok but I could tell from the look in your eyes that you were stuck in a vicious circle from which you saw no escape.
Society puts so much pressure on all of us to be the 'perfect' mum these days. But to me, the perfect mum is the one whose child knows that she loves them. Kids these days do swimming club, football club, tennis club, street dance club, brownies, cubs.....................the list is endless. You could be running around like a headless chicken making sure that your child has every good opportunity in life. But sometimes we just have to breathe. Take a moment to enjoy the simple pleasures that our children bring us. If you are battling with your child to do their reading homework, take it in turns to read a page each. If you have had a hard day at work, maybe give the kids clubs a miss for that night and enjoy some time together at home. And if you are having a mummy meltdown moment, accept that this is ok and know that we all have them whether we are working mums, stay at home mums, mums of four or mums of just one.
So please, stop putting so much pressure on yourself to do everything 'perfectly'. If you are shattered after your hard day, curl up with your little girl and just enjoy being together. So what if she doesn't do classes like karate after school. The tears flowing from her cheeks as she was told to kick and punch showed that she didn't want to be there anyway. She wanted to be with her mum.
When life gets too hectic just take a moment to pause and enjoy the lovely moments you have with your children as those are the ones that they will remember forever. And please, stop beating yourself up, you are doing a great job. x