You have two options when watching reality TV. Either accept it for being the scripted drama that it is and bask in its warming glow or sit there moaning about it 'supposedly being a reality show' for its duration. If you do the latter in any capacity please don't expect us to be friends. A weary sigh in the wrong place is enough for me to ask you leave the house immediately.
There is nothing worse than sitting down with a cuppa and healthy snack (a family sized bar of chocolate counts as healthy right?) to watch your weekly dose of TOWIE, Made in Chelsea, X Factor - you name it, I watch it - than hearing a running commentary of how everything is set up, nothing is as it seems, votes are rigged and people are 'acting'.
We reality TV lovers are acutely aware that the drama is contrived, the feuding friendships fake and the romances - well they are real obviously - and we love the shows for that. Who actually wants to see real life when they come in from work? Norris heating up his meal for one while putting the bins out of an evening or Margaret tending to her 47 cats while she irons her husband's shirts. And that's just my neighbours. Lovely people but just not dramatic enough for me.
But while we know all this, we don't like to be reminded of it by smug family members/friends/generally miserable people. Imagine if you were engrossed in your favourite book and after every chapter, a pop up jumped out at you saying 'What's the point in reading on? Nothing is real, it's a book stupid'. It would be annoying right? So stop saying it during every ad break then people.
So you can imagine my horror at the news that participants from not one but two of my favourite reality shows were taking aim at their makers. Strictly Come Dancing's Aliona Vilani said producers had strategically partnered her with golfing legend Tony Jacklin to get her booted out of the show as quickly as possible and X Factor's Lorna Simpson said she had also been set up to leave in the first week after being made up to look like a 40-something year-old. To be honest I'm not sure what she is going on about, I thought she looked younger on Saturday than she did on her first audition. When judge Gary Barlow told her she sounded like she had been singing for 50 years, I think he was saying what we were all thinking - 26? Pull the other one love.
It is one thing when a moany mate informs you Spencer may be acting in his role as Chelsea's 'bad boy' in MIC - a foolish comment, the man is obviously a complete arsehole - but quite another when the very people who are part of the reality machine try to shatter your enjoyment of said shows. It is a cheap trick and all it hurts are the viewers. So can I respectfully ask that when people are booted/dumped/eliminated from reality shows, you all please keep a lid on it. While we know you are pawns in the hands of the producers, we enjoy loving you or hating you too much to care.