19/10/2015 12:35 BST | Updated 18/10/2016 06:12 BST

Owning Your Sexuality

We live a world of polarities - North Pole to South pole, action to rest, wax to wan. It's the polarities of the universe that holds the universe together (as well as making life interesting!). Our earth is held in the orbit of the sun by such forces. It is the force that attractes man to woman.

I am a card carrying feminist. I don't need to act like a man to prove I am smart, strong, and independent. I inhabit all those qualities better when I act in my nature as a woman. As a feminist its my right and my pleasure to own the fact I am a woman.

Its complete and utter rubbish men are scared of a strong woman. I work with successful men in banking, technology, and media every day. Men are literally gasping for the new female to collaborate and lead.


What does this woman look like? She dresses like a woman. She asks for exactly what she wants from a center of calm and confidence. She listens as others speak and she responds with consideration and compassion. She does not feel the need to ramble, quantify, or diminish her femininity.

In other words, she looks like Beyonce. Rihanna, Beyonce, Gwen Stefani, Madonna are modern archetypes we uphold in our need to experience this woman. These strong and sexy women embrace their female nature whilst honing their male attributes of action and ambition, to create a truly magnetic existence all the world can feel.


Like many women for years I thought I had to act like a man in the business environment to be taken seriously and succeed. By disrupting my true essence I only created unnecessary struggle and strife. Be proud, confident, and secure in your femininity and things will flow better. We are coming to a time as a civilization where the female style of leadership - intuitive, nurturing, vulnerable - is overtaking the patriarchal way of leadership - authoritative, disconnected, ego-based. Most men are ready for this type of woman to lead and direct in a strong but gentle way of integrity serving the higher good of the whole community.


It is every woman's birthright to experience what I am speaking about. If you're a woman and not experiencing this empowerment then you are acting too much from the male (ie, too masculine) or you are too insecure and needy. I recommend reading my last blog post on self-love.

If you are an empowered woman - a feminst - rejoice in the your inherent power in all areas of your life - professionally, socially, academically and sexually. The best way to improve - or heal - your sex life is to embrace her femininity in all areas of your life including in the bedroom. When the man to woman polarity diminishes so does their attraction to one another. When one takes on too many traits of the other the whole sexual relationship dampens and ultimately breaks down.

Owning your sexual power as a woman is one of the most fulfilling - and fun!! - things you can do! Forget about the act of actually having sex - I'm talking about feeling totally comfortable and proud of your sexiness because the female shape and female energy is sexy and infinitely creative! We create other humans - men can't do that!!

Dear Men - its your fault too if you're not having an awesome romantic life. You need to empower your woman - women do well with compliments. Whatever you desire from her you need to focus on in a positive way - compliment her appearance, encourage her spontaneity. Show her that you can be the man and we can trust you. We need to see you as the man. Behave this way in every action you take. That means acting in integrity, confidence, strength, and compassion. A woman will never nag or second guess a man who stands firmly in these qualities. Own these qualities and we will let you be the man, without question. If we can't trust you we won't ever be able to sit back in our full feminine nature.

Drop the whole "the woman is always right" attitude. No one is always right. Don't resign yourself. Be someone we can respect as an equal who won't recoil in the face of debate. If you are going to be a man, be a man in an honorable way. If we can't trust you we can't give ourselves to you - romantically or otherwise.


Go enjoy! As the Buddha says, "There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way."

Much love,

Noelle xx