11/03/2013 10:39 GMT | Updated 11/05/2013 06:12 BST

You Are Not Big Boned, You're Fat!

It's the sorry truth most women can't handle because they are too dishonest with themselves to acknowledge that they have put on too much weight or have poor eating habits. It's time to start owning your fabulousness and your flaws. Fuller figured is the new "it word" and socially acceptable phrase for those on the fat side of the scale, but does it really change the way people feel about themselves? I have long believed it's not about what size your hips are but rather how confident you are with the curves you posses. How well you can work it?

Fat and skinny have long been at odds. It's like water and oil, they just don't mix. The fat girls hate the skinny ones, though sometimes there is a secret desire to be the same size and the skinny ones are sometimes so up themselves that they are sickening. Living in a society where perfection is preached though impossible to attain can be frustrating. What is perfection anyway? It changes like the weather. One day you're hot and the next you are not.

The truth is, there's nothing wrong with being a big girl or a skinny one, as long as you are happy. Contentment is the key when it comes to your body image. When all is said and done, do you like that girl staring back at you in the mirror? If the answer is no, then start making some changes to embrace the new you. Sometimes you have to get really fed up with your situation in order to make a lasting change. Start exercising, improving your diet and developing a positive mental attitude until you become what will make you happy.

It's unfair when someone picks on a lady for being fuller figured. It's equally annoying when slim people get stick for being smaller. No, not everyone starves themselves to be skinny. The mainstream media idolises a particular look and defines it as beautiful, but that doesn't give curvy ladies the right to hate on the women who naturally fall into that bracket. I've met people who have been bullied for being fine and fabulous. Whether you are on the bigger or smaller end of the scale bullying is never right, for any reason full stop.

There is true empowerment in being comfortable in your own skin especially when you have significant influence over others to improve their self image. One of the secrets to looking great is finding the right attire that suits your frame. There are five main types of body shapes the hour glass, inverted triangle, ruler, pear and apple. It's really about creating the illusion of symmetry from left to right and top to bottom with a defined nipped in waist in the middle.

Create a seamless silhouette by drawing attention to your most flattering areas using colours and accessories that compliment your skin tone. Remember accessories tend to outlive your clothes so choose them carefully. There is no magic to looking flawless, simply highlight your best features and camouflage your problem areas with darker shades and smart tailored shapes. Every girl needs spanx for the simple fact that cellulite just doesn't care who you are or what size you come in.

Bottom line, be kind to yourself, be honest and be your first best friend, fat or not remember that you are always fabulous.