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Joe Mott

Tabloid bloke, music manager and dog-lover who you recognise, but don't know why

Yes it was me on that Amy Winehouse thing, no I don’t know how to hack a phone and Stevie Wonder is the biggest icon I’ve ever met.
I've been in newspapers since I was a teen, won awards for my Daily Star music column, wrote the infamous Joe Mott's Blog and spent several years getting smashed and naked with celebrities.
These days, I'm a music manager, media trainer and contributor to whoever wants me to write for them. Whether you think I’m cool or a cock, please check out my artist’s page http://www.facebook.com/ElsieMusic

Who's Having Hot Sex?

As the scorching UK heatwave turns Facebook, Twitter and all other known social media into one big sweaty groan of status updates, I wonder - who's having sex in this heat? The nation's grinding must surely have, er, ground to a halt.
18/07/2013 17:26 BST

Bruce Willis and the Vanishing Car

I'm quite sure that by the strict letter of the law, Hackney Council are perfectly entitled to take my car and charge me that money because - despite being an Olympic Park away (almost) from where I was parked - they had put up a sign.
04/12/2012 16:53 GMT

Rebecca Ferguson Q&A...

Ten days or so ago I wrote a blog on here, praising Rebecca Ferguson's wondrous voice. I was amazed that after so many bland, boring, average singers had been coughed up via the <em>X Factor</em>, the law of averages had finally kicked in and some talent had been found. Shortly afterwards, I was offered an interview with Rebecca.
11/12/2011 23:57 GMT

Rebecca Ferguson: X Factor's Best Yet?

It's like going to McDonald's and somehow, without expecting or ordering it, coming out with the finest haute cuisine meal of your life. I only hope we as an audience haven't had our aural taste buds numbed by too many years of fast food music to really appreciate Rebecca's talent.
22/11/2011 12:40 GMT

Read This Before Pop Music Dies...

As I said in my last post, music is at its all time lowest state, with pretend dance and fake urban tunes plus meaningless lyrics and no groove clogging up our charts like a festering turd in the u-bend of a public latrine.
16/11/2011 14:44 GMT

Steps' Reunion Shows Pop Music is at an All-Time Low.

The music now is just a selection of rave presets we used to listen to in the 90s along with beats so weak they wouldn't challenge clock radio speakers. David Guetta is everywhere, ruining everything he touches. Kanye West has decided to become a singer. Cher Lloyd is...oh balls to her. Matt Cardle is...nah, balls to him too.
25/10/2011 23:58 BST

Scarlett's Bottom - Shame on us for Looking

You'd think I'd be numbed to tits and arse by now. Tabloid background, former swordsman etc. But when those Scarlett Johansson pictures hit the net, I joined everyone else in clicking the little yfrog Twitter link - and then cursing as it failed to load three times.
15/09/2011 23:00 BST

Tabloid Tossers - be Nice to us Hacks

Not a week goes by without some other hack getting a kicking from the professionally disgusted of Twitter, spurred on by a small army of would-be writers, transparently jealous of their chosen target's success.
06/09/2011 00:02 BST