You are NOT fat. You are just a shade short of 5'8 and a size 8. That is not fat. Not in my book, not in anyone's book. Our society has become obsessed with body image.
What if Valentine's Day, or relationships in general, were a stark reminder of the most painful and distressing events that you ever experienced? What if they triggered a trauma so terrifically challenging that it forever altered your approach to life? Welcome to Valentine's Day, and relationships, for adoptees.
If you are secure in your relationship and have made a commitment to each other your love, friendship, trust and confidence in your other half should be more important than one day a year when clever mass marketing of cards and double priced flowers hits the shops, adverts and media.
But beyond the polarity of 'proud to be single' vs 'smug married' is more human uncertainty than any other sphere of life. People are unreliable and relationships a gamble, bodies don't work as required when babies are meticulously planned. Being single may be gloriously liberating one day, bleakly lonely the next. This is life.
Indeed, love probably means as many different things as there are people - from the unselfish care of a Mother Teresa to the heart-pounding passion of star-crossed lovers Romeo and Juliet. Yet with Valentine's Day upon us it's the romantic variety tugging at our heartstrings, especially if we lack that special someone to share it with.
So there you have my three most memorable Valentine Days: a rejection, a freak, and non-event, yet I still LOVE Valentine's Day. I'm hanging out (praying) for an amazing one to finally arrive filled with Cartier - Kanye style, Roses and most importantly with the love of my life.
A lot of things can come out of heartbreak. For me, breakups always entailed a lot more free time, the ability to focus solely on myself and a few love lessons. Here are my favourite ones below, all the credit goes to my (unnamed) ex-boyfriends. Thanks gents!
During February we can often feel low, the weather is dreadful and Spring might feel a long way away. What is the secret of feeling calmer and happier despite the trials of this time of year?
If you're facing Valentine's Day alone, you may be questioning why you have such bad luck. Being 'lucky' is actually a state of mind, as discovered by psychologist Richard Wiseman in his ten year study. Here are seven rules to improve your luck in relationships based on his findings.
I had high hopes of The Mistress Contract being an illuminating and entertaining read - not least because I'd been a mistress myself. For sixteen years I'd had a rollercoaster affair with a married man who encouraged me to transform from a dowdy housewife to a sexy professional Dominatrix with my own dungeon in London.
Relationship anxiety is very destructive, as you know. If you don't learn how to get rid of anxiety in your relationship, it leads into a very devastating downward spiral.
While some believe woman inherently feeling guilty about X,Y and Z has "become lazy journalism folklore - like how men can't multitask and women can't park a car" research suggests it might actually be true. Which is flippin' great for us, right girls?
Don't sweat the small stuff. Everybody has annoying habits. There needs to be some tolerance of your partner's pecadillos. Some weirdos put the butter in the cupboard because that's what their mum did, even though this is a gross miscarriage of justice
You can permanently re-wire you subconcious mind to accept these affirmations by listening to them in a deep meditative state. By changing your predominant thought process, you will eventually change your life and attract in the life that you dream of and deserve.
Honestly, after all that I have experienced, I seek something much more fulfilling than casual flings, trivial dates and meaningless sex. Because I know exactly how I would feel after I've opened up myself to someone, and given myself to him, but he turns out to be a total jerk.
My ex-boyfriend really annoyed me. The guy before that infuriated me. The one I was with for five years? Constant frustration. But the guy who I dated for a few weeks but never really clicked with? Didn't annoy me at all. Inoffensive just doesn't really do it for me.