01/06/2015 09:58 BST | Updated 01/06/2015 18:59 BST

Kim Pregnant With Second Child


Not to be outdone, North Koreandictator Kim Jong Un has announced his pregnancy hours after Kim Kardashianand Kanye West'snew baby news hit the headlines.

Mr Kim, who invented the sock and has super human strength after eating bananas, is thought to be the only man in the history of North Korea to be able to become pregnant.

North Korean propagandists say his surprising medical marvel was made possible by a unicorn who implanted the child inside of him.

Mr Kim, pictured with girlfriend Ri Sol Ju, sports specially created male maternity wear in keeping with his nation's strict dress code

The eccentric dictator, who conceived via immaculate conception, says he plans to name the child Kim South East "in protest to the capitalist pigs".

Mr Kim is said to be relaxing with his female pleasure squad during this difficult time, while still playing as centre-forward for the North Korean international football team and keeping goal for the Pyongyang Rovers.

Kim is also the lead singer of North Korea's only boy band - Jong Direction - winners of North Korea's Got Talent three years in a row. Unfortunately, all the other members of Jong Direction died in bizarre, yet entirely seperate, accidents where their heads were nailed to a coffee table, leaving Kim to shoulder the weighty burden of being North Korea's leading teen heart-throb.


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