Why Have Kelly Brook And Viola Davis Taken Their Breasts Hostage?

Why Have Kelly Brook And Viola Davis Taken Their Breasts Hostage?
|

The pictures of Kelly Brook sitting front row at the Giles show on Monday and the ones of Viola Davis attending the 43rd NAACP Image Awards on 17 Feb have caused us to clutch our hands to our chests and wince in sympathy with their tightly-bound bosoms.

Photos: FilmMagic

And so we feel we must speak out in defence of oppressed breasts everywhere.

Ladies, the wise words of Wonderbra should be ringing in your ears right about now - LIFT AND SEPARATE. Instead this wisdom is being ignored in favour of squishing and smooshing. The result is not too dissimilar from a couple of bald men having a forehead wrestling contest within the top half of your dress and, from our own youthful experimentation with cleavage boosting techniques on nights out, it's more than a little painful (although kind of useful if you need an impromptu storage space for your debit card).

More importantly, such chest transgressions mean no-one learned ANYTHING from the Great Boob Squashing Of 2011, as perpetrated by Jennifer Hudson's orange Oscars gown.

Photo; WireImage

Or Christina Hendricks' I Don't Know How She Does It dress:

Photo: FilmMagic

Or Miranda Kerr's crushed cleavage at the Warner Bros and InStyle Golden Globes party

Photo: Getty

In short, breasts are for life, not just for glitzy events so stop bullying them into too-tight tops.

For balance here's a selection of Viola Davis' better fashion moments: