I see trouble ahead...don't you? Our children are heading into the abyss of low self-esteem and self-loathing at a startling rate. Let's assess the recent incident in Magaluf. One young woman and 23 young men involved in a sexual act in public. I have read various viewpoints in the newspapers. Vilifying the young girl as a "slut", "whore" and "depraved", I have read others that claim she is "a courageous exhibitionist", "liberated sexually" or an "empowered female".
Somewhere I've briefly encountered mention of the young men, although their involvement seems insignificant and apparently "acceptable" because "well that's what boys do". Really? Do they?
Well it doesn't really matter what WE think of those involved does it? It happened. It's in the past. It cannot be changed. I'm sure they feel some regret or conscience about what they did or maybe they don't. What really disturbs me is the WHY? There is an underlying factor and common denominator here and this is of concern, the dramatic increase of Low-Self-Esteem.
It is apparent in nearly every young person I meet. They drink to excess, cover their bodies in tattoos, have so many sexual partners that they can't even count them, either starve themselves or stuff themselves, have plastic surgery to increase their bust size or work out in the gym and shave their chests and I want to know why is our youth so self-loathing? What happened? I don't buy into this theory of a new millennium tribe emerging, or our youth being allowed to express itself, freely and without constraints. It's because they have no concept of "respect". Respect for themselves, those around them, their families, no-one. Do they even understand the meaning of respect?
Let's try it, ask your teenager, child or any young person you know to define "Self-Respect". I think their answers will be interesting.
I myself suffered from low self-respect, two of my three sisters suffer from it (the youngest one escaped it) and my parents and my grandparents on both sides. I married a man who had it and his parents too.....so I'm pretty well qualified in defining what it is and how to overcome it. It has taken me a lifetime of mistakes, guilt, reckless actions and living with a conscience to be able to understand the solution completely and simply. Self-respect comes from "thinking before acting".
This is the cornerstone of mindfulness and in my opinion needs to be taught in our schools from the outset. If we could teach our children to deliberate, consider and weigh up the pros and cons before committing to an act, they would undertake that approach naturally throughout their lives. In order to build this awareness we need to practice this ourselves. No more irrational, emotional outbursts, acting without compassion, withholding love, gossiping or constant negative mind banter. We are all guilty of this because that's what most of us experienced growing up. There can't be any other explanation for what's happening today can there? Our childhood training, our parents training, our grandparents training....all perpetuates the cycle. We've all been, berated, controlled or criticised throughout and after generations of focused, practised behaviour we've finally perfected it to such an extent that we have turned a huge proportion of the world into a modern day 'Sodom & Gomorrah'.
Mindfulness is a state of mind that can turn society around. It's not a question of judgment of the young people involved in the "Magaluf incident". More a moral issue and if they enjoyed it, which I can almost bet.....they didn't and wish to god they had not participated in! The inner torment of the low self-esteem person is to beat themselves up from within and I expect that's exactly what they're doing.
Round and around and around and around....we go!
Tell me now, tell me now, tell me now......that you know?
What are we gonna do about it?