09/09/2014 05:41 BST | Updated 08/11/2014 05:59 GMT

Learning To Let Go - Stressful Parenting


I remember the time that both my children left me at the school gate and entered into the world of education and the overwhelming emotions and feelings of worry, loss and lack of control. It wasn't a fear that I had but an underlying concern over what choices they would make and how they would deal with experiences that they hadn't yet encountered.

As a parent there will always be a natural need to protect them from potential harm or our past negative experiences, however in order educate them we need to let go...allow them to learn from the world outside of our control.

Our roles can quickly flip from being the parental caretaker to the parental friend, this transition is hard to accept as it's innate within our human makeup to feel wanted/needed. Because of this, the emotions encountered can often be similar to those felt when losing a loved one and it's important to quickly bring them under control to avoid further overpowering negative emotions.

The management of this form of stressor is ultimately down to your ability to control your language at that given moment - interrupting your linguistic pattern with something positive.

Here are three things that you can do to help overcome stressful situation:

1. Breathe: when faced with that situation take conscious deep breaths and bring your thoughts back under control. Remember logical thinking is a must and the temporary emotions will pass.

2. Think: think about the message you are giving the child. Parenting is about education, and in those situations it's important to stay strong and project a positive message. If you are having trouble, then explain the reasons why you are "temporarily" acting in this manner.

3. Move Forward: the environments where these situations happen will become less of a trigger the more that you face and deal with them. Each time you feel slightly down, picture yourself in months to come without these emotions or feelings.

In summary: the feelings that you encounter are perfectly normal and natural, the more you discuss and allow others to be aware of these the easier it will be to deal with them. Breath, think and move forward, knowing that your children will respond based on what you communicate.

Benjamin has a proven track record in getting to the root of any problem in high-speed timing; his no-nonsense approach towards change has made him the leading choice with A-List Celebrities and International Athletes. Benjamin's Hypnotherapy and Coaching clinics run most weeks from Central London and the South Coast. If you're struggling with fears, phobias or are in need of weight related support then you can email him today

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