THE BLOG
21/12/2017 15:09 GMT | Updated 21/12/2017 15:09 GMT

Prince Harry And Meghan's Pre-marriage Counselling Is A Welcome Step

 

I was glad to hear that the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby has apparently agreed to marry Prince Harry and his bride to be Meghan Markle in May.

Archbishop Welby is also expected to meet the couple for some Christian pre-marriage counselling in advance of the wedding. This too is a welcome step.

The couple have chosen to get married in St George’s Chapel at Windsor.

Although nothing has been made public yet, sources say that the Archbishop has met the happy couple already and found them to be “delightful” and “totally committed” to each other.

I firmly believe that more couples should go for pre-marriage counselling, whether Christian, Jewish, Muslim or of any other religious faith.

I can only imagine that with the euphoria and excitement in the run-up to any wedding, couples don’t have time to stop and think about their differences of opinion – or more importantly, the opinions of some interfering in-law types.

Young couples often brush aside their early difficulties as trivial and unimportant; if these are left unattended to or simply brushed under the carpet, they are like to rear their ugly head at a later stage in a relationship and can cause unpleasant resentment and hostility between a couple.

I do think that sometimes our religious leaders, such as vicars, priests or rabbis, don’t have sufficient experience in couples counselling to give the right guidance or direction for couples who might be struggling in the early days of their marriage.

It does take an experienced, qualified couples or marriage counsellor to navigate the differences and difficulties and provide a safe platform for the two parties to air their points of view and move to a safer place.

Perhaps too often young couples, trying to sort out the early weeks of marriage and the hurdles that go with, don’t know where to turn if things go wrong.

Blokes in particularly are often terrible at talking about their emotions or problems, while women tend to turn to their women friends and perhaps colleagues at work.

Sometimes couples just don’t know how to talk to each other or listen to each other. It might seem like a simple thing, but so often I hear of couples who tell me how their partner or spouse has failed to hear them.

It’s always a good idea for couples to set aside a private time once a week to talk to each other about how their week has gone and what difficulties or successes they might have experienced.

Returning to Prince Harry and Miss Markle, on the few occasions I have seen them together being interviewed on television, I could not help notice how they did listen to each other. And more importantly they give the distinct impression that they care for each other, which can only be positive and helpful in any relationship.