Rio 2016 Opening Ceremony In Funny Tweets

Funny bikes, little plants and some insanely scary spiders.

Funny bikes, little plants, Dame Judi Dench and some insanely scary spiders - the opening ceremony of the Rio Olympic opening ceremony was certainly eventful.

Not that you’d have known it from the rather subdued start...

It began with the beginnings of life itself.

And when evolution kicked in people across the world got a little bit scared.

Soon, humanity made an appearance.

All of a sudden suburbia sprang from the ground.

There were high hopes of who could make a guest appearance.

He must have been disappointed because this happened.

But then the dancing started!

But at least the sound quality was good.

In fact Limmy appeared to be even more pissed off than usual at the whole thing.

But someone seemed to be enjoying it.

And you have to feel for those who didn’t qualify.

Then there was a touching section on pollution and the climate narrated by none other than Dame Judi Dench.

We were only an hour in and it was already proving divisive.

And there was the small matter of when teams would appear in the arena considering Portuguese spelling mixed things up a bit.

And in the UK it was already getting late.


It soon became apparent the commentators were engaged in some kind of fact-off competition with each other.

But at least the Russians were doing well.

There were a few unexpected entrances.

By now people were tired and realising waiting for all those teams to make an entrance was going to take a long time.

Then we got to “M”.

Meanwhile in London...

But at least we had things like this to keep us entertained.

Oh, and those bikes...

Then for some reason - can’t think why - everyone went a bit la la over the Tongan flag bearer.

Then things took a turn for the weird when it transpired the actual CIA were getting involved.

Of corse what we were all waiting for was the entry of Team GB and whether or not flag bearer Andy Murray was going to carry on with Brit tradition and carry it one-handed, because apparently that’s a thing.

Then it was time for the unveiling of the rings.

The honour of lighting the Olympic flame went to...

But at least it looked pretty.

Anyway, that was about it.

Wasn’t as good as London 2012 though...