22/12/2016 09:04 GMT | Updated 23/12/2017 05:12 GMT

Confessions Of A Frumpy Mum

It's that time of year where I stuff my face full of crap before the annual New Year diet starts. You know the one that you inevitably end up restarting every other Monday for the rest of the year. Kate Moss need not comment.

Honestly, I am an overweight cliché. I start well. I maybe lose 12lbs. I then have a "day off" for whatever reason. A night out (rare). Most likely just a shit mood. And there follows a few more days off until it makes sense to start again on Monday. Because it almost always makes sense to start on a Monday.

Got something to celebrate? Pass me the cake!

Kids driven you nuts right up until bedtime? This calls for Domino's.

Bored? Children napping? Time to reach for chocolate and enjoy some uninterrupted bliss.

That's me people. Food for whatever the occasion.

I'm tired of being like this though and I'm determined to change. Even though I fully admit I am currently guiltily eating my way through Christmas all the way to New Year. I wish I could say its making me feel better. The reality is it's not. I am just greedy. And adding some extra pounds/rolls to my collection.

It's got to the point that I have a frumpy Mum wardrobe. I also have a ton of clothes that are about 5 years old that fill one side of my wardrobe awaiting the day I can wear them again. They'll be vintage soon (yeah, okay - I've probably never been that fashionable). I can't be arsed with my hair because I might as well complete the "look".

Christmas get togethers serve as reminder that I have no clothes that fit so I want to hide at home and wear my PJ bottoms whenever possible - because they're comfy and fit.

I avoid being in family photos and prefer to be the one taking them - because I don't want to see myself. But I don't want to look back and not see me in photos with my kids. How sad would that be?

Thigh gap? I'm just hoping for no more fucking leg chafing! How's that for honesty?

So...wish me luck! I'm putting it out there, surely I can't keep failing at this?! Here's to shifting the pounds. Here's to "I can and I will". Here's to being healthy for me and my kids.

And if you're about to endlessly repeat to yourself "nothing tastes better than skinny feels" too in 2017 - good luck!

Bring it on.

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