16/03/2012 07:09 GMT | Updated 16/05/2012 06:12 BST

Tales From the Middle of Nowhere (Vol. 2): European Highlights


Well now it has been a long time hasn't it? About a week or so? Fuck knows. I'll try and recall some of the best bits for you.

Berlin! Never really got to see much of that place down the years and if I did it was under cover of darkness. I had a much better look around this time though. Very beautiful indeed - the sunny weather might have had something to do with it, but to say it was virtually destroyed during that Second World War, it still has some magnificent sights.

The gig itself was great I think. I do remember the soundcheck being the the worst I've ever, ever done, truly appalling. The gig was mega though... oh yeah... and there was some bird down the front with a placard that read something like... "PLEASE COME TO THE LEBANON! WE LOVE YOUR HIGH FLYING BIRDS!"

The Lebanon eh? Might give that a miss...

Now... Munich? Not much going on there as I remember. Cold, wet and windy. The end.

Rome on the other hand was magnificent. Rome is magnificent, I fucking LOVE that place! One of the greatest places on earth, no question. Pity I was working though. The sun was out, the streets were full, the only thing missing was my good lady wife, she'd have been in her element!

The gig was equally as magnificent. Those kids break all kinds of records for the loudest, most passionate, most intense, most... most mostest fans in the world! Crazy kids. They are mithering fuckers though... "one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign, one picture, please sign..." And that was just the hotel staff!!

Outside the gig they have A LOT of bootleg t-shirt stalls. I had to drive through them to get to the backstage area bit upon where I saw many, many T-shirts bearing my name and face etc.

Right in the middle of one particular stall though was a T-shirt that simply said... "SEXY BITCH!"

Now it remains unclear as to who or what this particular item was referring to. I'd like to think it may have had a little picture of me on the back... or my drummer!

Took the train to Milan the day after that for a little one of those acoustic gigs I do from time to time. Not the best I have to say, I just wasn't in the mood somehow.

Caught another train to Zurich the next day. What a ride! Up and over the Alps, magnificent scenery. T'was all too beautiful (as Steve Marriott once sang). Unfortunately the gig was a shocker. Without doubt the worse I've ever done, just piss poor. The crowd loved it though which somehow made it even worse. An unsatisfactory end to a great little tour.

You currently find me in the most depressing hotel in all of Europe. Flying home today... 10 days off!

See you in America.