Yes droogs.
Just a quick one. Not much to report as, well, nothing's happened.
I just want to share with you something that happened to me in a clothes shop today in NYC.
So, I'm out shopping. Not looking for anything in particular. Just killing time. Enjoying the weather. (Very pleasant. Almost spring-like.)
I'm in some shop or other, not showing much interest in the merchandise, and the usual scenario starts to unfold. You know the one?
Shop assistant: "Hi, can I help you with anything today?"
Me: "Erm... No thanks... I'm just looking."
(SO FAR, SO GOOD.)
Shop assistant: "Are you looking for anything in particular? A jacket? Some jeans? A sweater?"
Me: "No thanks... I'm just looking."
Shop assistant: "How about these sneakers? These are really cool."
Me: "..." Just a little stare
Shop assistant: "What size are you?"
Me: "40, if you must know."
Shop assistant: "Great, I'll go get you a pair."
Now at this point I would ordinarily wait 'til this idiot had wafted behind the curtain and leg it, but for some unknown reason I sat on a little leather stool and waited... and waited.
Just as I'm about to walk out he re-appears box in hand.
Shop assistant: "Here you go."
Me: "Thanks."
So, as luck would have it, they were too big. (Are my bastard feet shrinking now??)
Me: "Sorry mate, they're too big."
Shop assistant: "What? Really? The 40 is too big? Really?"
Me: "Really."
Then - with a straight face (and I'm not joking) - he said this...
Shop assistant: "You know... baggy shoes are very popular right now."
Me: "..." Just a little stare
UN-FUCKIN-BELIEVABLE.
Now... I'm gonna be out of the game until Wednesday/Thursday. Some of my mates are in town and it's probably gonna get pretty messy.
In a bit.
GD
Noel's tour diary is published in full at www.NoelGallagher.com