This is what I've noticed about advertising (it's not a recent development, but I've been having such a dedicated, nightly liaison with Netflix that I've avoided television adverts for quite some time); only women like yoghurt. Particularly, women like eating yoghurt alone, in profile with their eyes shut.
"He treats me so well. Although he always wants to have butt sex... I say no he does it anyway, which is annoying... and he's just like 'Imogen; you have to'... One time he had so much sex with me that I passed out and then he fed me crackers! It's not as bad as it sounds."
This girl could have had a husband, a tiara, a baby, a title, a palace, and her own specialised bottom minder by now. She could have been defined by her slimness, her reproductive abilities, and how long she could spend waving to commoners before her arm got tired. Instead, she's free to do whatever the hell she wants with her life.
With hair flowing beneath the signature red and white polka dot headscarf, chin raised and facial expression confident; she lifts her rolled up denim jumpsuit to reveal one very nicely toned and bulging bicep. On her left hand, her golden wedding ring shines.
If there were a competition for false advertising, the much-talked-about trailer for the Fifty Shades of Grey movie would walk away with first prize... If we move from the trailer to the book, the sex isn't so much hot as violent and dehumanizing. Christian has a thing for what is generally called sadomasochism in the popular press, but in the book what we see is pure sadism carried out by a sophisticated predator who knows how to groom vulnerable girls. The most likely real-world ending of Fifty Shades of Grey is fifty shades of black and blue.
This is exasperating. In a world where the prevalence of inherent sexism, homophobia and transphobia is rife, why would individuals who actively defy these ills insist on continuing and supporting relationships with alleged predators?
I simply ask the modern day feminists of western society: What are you fighting for? You have the right to vote, you have the right to education, and you even have the right to voice these opinions. If anything you have it made.
We all deserve a cheerleader, a champion, an equal. I've taken it this far, and I've done it goddamn well. If this is life alone, then life in a partnership - a coupling where we make each other better, compensate for weaknesses and amplify strengths - well, s**t. That'd be some life.
I am what some would refer to as a slut. The word slut traditionally comes with negative connotations. It implies the owner of such a label is promiscuous and out of control. It is used as a derogatory term, as an insult or with intention to offend. Insulted? Offended? Not in the slightest.
I'm not sure about you but I'm still figuring things out as I go along - and I don't think there is any shame in that. We might not always like what we hear but we've got to respect it all the same. The power of debate is rooted in our differences and imperfections. The tide of subsequent social and political change relies as much on our ears as our mouths.
Teenage girls across the world are publicly rejecting feminism. Now, excuse me one moment while I get inside my bomb shelter, but I can kind of see their point...
It may surprise you to hear that, as a woman living in the 21st Century, I had spent my entire life believing that Feminism didn't concern me. I thought the issue (yep, just the one!) had gone away. At school, I could wear trousers just like the boys if I wanted to. Of course, I didn't, they were horrible, but the option was there if I felt that strongly about it. I didn't.
The recent calls for the founding of a feminist political party have overlooked the fact that such a party already exists. The Green Party has a tranche of women-centric policies, though it could be argued that we fail to adequately promote them.
Many feminist blogs have neither money nor a room of their own - run by volunteers working remotely in their free time. What Feminist Times set out to do was something radically different - not just a blog, but an online magazine which maintained regular, high-quality output by paying staff and contributors alike; an ad-free haven from commercial women's magazines...
The conference was not for but about African heritage women so the white participants had every right to be there. At the same time the systemic exclusion of black women in the west causes deep, legitimate wounds. Nsukka demonstrates how important it is to communicate, and to voice difficult feelings such as anger and hurt, in order to find solutions.
Now immune to bitchiness, gossip, whispering and detestable drama queens, an education in so many subjects was not the only thing I left school with, but also an education in how to cope with life in general... whenever there's women around that is.