I was on the tube the other day, and since I find the proximity of my face to the faces of strangers a rather undesirable experience, I had my gaze directed firmly to the floor. It was then that I observed a pair of shoes that I found both alarmingly ugly, and, quite frankly, unsettling. These shoes, I believe, go by the name of 'winkle pickers'.
I've sometimes toyed with the idea of getting a tattoo, but there's something about the permanency and probably the pain that stops me entering through those parlour doors. However, I recently came across Oliver Sweeney offering the option of getting a tattoo on their shoes, and this instantly seemed like a much more painless option.
She is now gracing front covers, has a child whose name is inspired by the points on a compass and is a product created and exploited by her own mother. I remember being so terrified introducing my first boyfriend to my parents, I am unsure when the (alleged) brokering of a deal regarding your daughter's sex tape became the norm.
This month, adidas Originals announced the return of the Stan Smith shoe. A trainer created in the Seventies and made infamous by the legendary player and its namesake. After vanishing from production lines two years ago the tennis shoe is back and this time it's got Kate Moss' face on the tongue. *Shakes with excitement*. *Passes out*.