16/06/2015 12:36 BST | Updated 17/06/2015 09:59 BST

Donald Trump's Hair Announces Candidacy For President Of The United States

Donna Ward/ABACA USA
Developer Donald J Trump poses during a photocall to celebrate the Trump International Hotel & Tower Dubai with a 14-foot replica Lego Tower at Columbus Circle in Central Park in New York City.

The wild animal stapled to Donald Trump's head has announced its candidacy for President of the United States, standing for the Copious Amounts Of Hair Spray Party.

The announcement was made live from Trump Towers at 11am local time on Tuesday.

Mr Trump's hair is already leading in the polls, apparently seen as the sturdiest of all available candidates. This is potentially caused by the seven bottles of Pantene Pro-V it takes for the real estate tycoon to solidify his follicles every morning.