Amanda Holden Describes Heartbreaking Moment She Was Told Son Was Stillborn | HuffPost Life

Holden praised NHS staff and said she couldn't have got through it without their support.

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Life editor at HuffPost UK

Amanda Holden spoke through tears as she described the moment she found out her son Theo was stillborn and praised the NHS staff who supported her at the time.

“I just remember hearing this woman just screaming and screaming and then it was actually — it was me, I realised it was me that was screaming,” Holden says in an interview that will air tonight [24 May] as part of ITV’s ‘The NHS Saved My Life’, which marks 70 years of the National Health Service.

Holden, who is mum to Lexi, 12, and Hollie, six, with her husband Chris Hughes, had a stillbirth at seven months pregnant, just a year after she had suffered a miscarriage.

ITV

Holden called it the “most surreal, out-of-body experience” and said she was told she was calling out her eldest daughter’s name, because she didn’t know how she would tell her.

Speaking about her stillborn son - who she named Theo - she said on the show: “He looked so normal and so peaceful and I was still his mummy. So I held him in my arms and said goodbye.

“I couldn’t have done it without the incredible team around us. My husband was so strong and so amazing, but they got him through it too and then, the days and months afterwards, the same team of people checked on us every single day.”

Holden said she doesn’t believe she got special treatment with her aftercare because she was famous, adding: “I believe they would have extended that care to any woman and family in that situation.”

The mum-of-two added that she would “literally do anything” for the NHS because they got her through it.

Jeff Spicer via Getty Images

Amanda Holden and her eldest daughter Lexi.

In May 2012, the ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ presenter spoke about the traumatic birth of her second child Hollie, who she became pregnant with shortly after her stillbirth. Speaking on ‘This Morning’ at the time, Holden said she wasn’t going to have any more children, as her heart had stopped during childbirth and she lost 15 litres of blood.

“There was a lot of blood and it wouldn’t clot... but [the doctors] did say to me that if anything goes wrong they will put me under a general anaesthetic,” she said. “Then they said to me ‘You’re bleeding very heavily, we’re going to put you under a general anaesthetic’ and I said ‘okay’ because I had seen Hollie and cried with joy.”

‘The NHS Saved My Life’ is on ITV at 7.30pm Thursday 24 May.

Before You Go

Pregnancy worries and words of comfort

I have no morning sickness! Is that bad news?(01 of10)

You might have read things about how morning sickness signifies a healthy level of pregnancy hormones – but not having morning sickness does not mean you're lacking! Although many women suffer with it (and 'suffer' really is the word), many other women do not. Some women have it one pregnancy, but not in another. Attend all your usual checks and count yourself as one of the lucky ones! (credit:Alamy )

I drank before I knew I was pregnant, I might have harmed the baby(02 of10)

This happens to many, many expectant mums, and it's unlikely to be a cause for concern at all. Mention it to your GP/midwife, and just keep off the booze now, until you can enjoy a celebratory glass of fizz when your bundle arrives. (credit:Alamy )

I'll lose the baby(03 of10)

It's estimated about one in five pregnancies ends in early miscarriage, and it's thought most of those occur simply because the foetus wasn't developing properly. It does happen, but don't let it rule your thoughts because the vast majority of pregnancies do succeed. Try not to worry and remember that once you're into the second trimester, the chances of miscarriage is dramatically reduced. (credit:Alamy )

My baby might not be 'perfect'(04 of10)

It's estimated that one in 16 babies in the UK is born with a birth defect – but this figure refers to all birth defects, and many are mild and can be treated. So it's likely your baby won't have a birth defect, and even if they do, they will be perfect in their own way – remember support is available for every eventuality. Take your folic acid and attend your antenatal screening appointments. (credit:Alamy )

I won't make it to the hospital on time(05 of10)

You might have read terrifying stories about pregnant women giving birth in car parks and taxis – but these stories make it to the news because they are extraordinary, in the literal sense of the word! It very rarely happens, and most women get plenty of warning that labour is beginning. So plan well, and all is very likely to be fine. (credit:Alamy )

I might have to have a c-section(06 of10)

If you do end up needing a c-section, you might feel disappointed – but believe us, in the moment the only thing you'll really care about is the safe delivery of your baby. It won't be the end of the world and you won't care a jot when your baby is in your arms. (credit:Alamy )

I won't be able to cope during labour(07 of10)

There is just no telling how labour will be for you, so don't worry about it now. Make your birth plan, discuss it with your partner and midwife, and go with the flow on the day (it's okay to change your mind!). There will be lots and lots of help and support at your disposal. Not to mention drugs, should you need them. (credit:Alamy )

Labour will humiliating (will I poo on the bed?!)(08 of10)

You've heard about that then? It can happen, but the doctors and midwives have seen it all – they have experienced every possible scenario. They won't be worrying about things like that, so neither should you. (credit:Alamy )

I don't know how to be a mum(09 of10)

No-one does until they become one! Every new mum feels like they're winging it in the early days. As your baby grows and you get to know them, you'll learn. Trust in the fact that just about every mother has gone through it… and survived. (credit:Alamy )

I'm worried about gaining all that weight(10 of10)

You will put on weight, yes – but it's normal and nothing to be afraid of! Much weight gain is actually down to the baby, the placenta, extra blood in your system and the retention of water. Pregnancy changes your body in myriad ways – just enjoy it, and let your body just do its thing at this special time. Remember, there's no need to 'eat for two'… but eat what you need and don't count calories. (credit:Alamy )

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