Dad Perfectly Captures Hilarity Of Six-Month-Old Son's First Holiday: 'Our Checklist To Pack: Everything'

'Sandy beaches are a bad idea.'

A dad has comically documented the valuable lessons he learned taking his six-month-old son on holiday for the first time.

Matt Coyne, 41, a blogger from Sheffield, shared a detailed account covering everything from flying with a baby to why sandy beaches are a bad idea.

The hilarious post on Man Vs Baby has been shared by more than 15,000 people, who relate to the trials and tribulations of family holidays.  

"One or two people were a bit judgy about the idea of taking a six-month-old away. I said: 'It'll be fine' and you know what? It was."

Coyne went on to document the things he learned while holidaying with his "tiny human".

"The amount of stuff you need to take for a weekend is comical," he wrote.

"To go away for a whole week, it's roughly the same amount of stuff that the Nazis took to invade Poland.

"Also, don't take an expensive pram on a flight - the moment you check in and that pushchair disappears behind that rubber curtain, it is collected by two wrestlers who smash it against a wall for half an hour before it is transferred to the runway, where they reverse the plane over it a couple of times before placing it in the hold.

"At your destination, for some bizarre reason, you have to collect whatever is left of your pram (a wheel) from a baggage carousel that's f**king miles away."

Baby changing facilities on planes also got a mention.

"When airlines say they have 'baby changing facilities' what they actually mean is: 'a shelf'," he continued.

"Also, changing a baby in a plane toilet is like the hardest round on 'The Cube'.

"Basically imagine trying to carve a turkey in a phone box, now half the size of the f**king phone box, and arrange for an incontinent dickhead to bang on the door every five seconds."

Coyne addressed the issue of baby passports (they're a "rip off"), babies and suncream (they turn into "slippery seals") and the heat (apply factor "thrumpteen suncream"). 

But despite it all, the dad had one message to parents about taking babies on holiday. 

"What I would say to anyone considering taking their baby on holiday is this: go," he wrote.

"For all its pissy little challenges, to spend time together was incredibly special.

"I will always remember Charlie's face as he curled his toes in the sand for the first time, his delight at being pushed around a hotel pool on the back of an inflatable crocodile and his fascination as we sat on a bench, hand-feeding a sparrow some crisps, overlooking the deep blue of the mediterranean sea."

Coyne's Facebook post, uploaded on 20 April, has more than 10,000 comments and 48,000 likes.  

 "We took our nine-week-old baby on a sun holiday years ago and I can identify with so much of your hilarious account," one mother wrote.

"Best thing we ever did and continued to do regardless of age with the next three we had - well done."

Another commented: "Great to hear all that as I just booked a flight to the States for the summer and I will be traveling with my eight-month-old baby.

"Might be a bit more challenging in relation to the entertainment and also I will be on my own but I'm sure we'll be fine!"

10 Ways To Take The Stress Out Of Family Holidays
Get Off The Beaten Track(01 of10)
Open Image Modal
“We’re seeing a trend in families seeking out more authentic travel experiences that will inspire rather than distract their children,” says Tom. “There are plenty of unexpected destinations that are kid-friendly without being completely kid-focused that offer incredible experiences that will excite kids and grown-ups of all ages. Follow in the footsteps of Darwin himself and visit the Galapagos Islands—perfect for any budding zoologist. Heading to Australia? Try going walkabout with Aboriginal tribes in Australia. Or if you fancy a safari then why not meet the young Massai and learn of their ‘rites of passage’— even in our well-travelled world, there are still opportunities to find truly unique experiences, as long as you know where to look.” (credit:Alamy)
Find A Helping Hand(02 of10)
Open Image Modal
“Sometimes just getting your family out of the door can feel like an impossible task, let alone planning an entire holiday. This is where travel specialists come in,” says Tom. “For example we make sure that every single visa, airport transfer, flight and hotel is booked and ready to go so that all you have to do is sit back and enjoy the ride.” (credit:Alamy)
Be Prepared – And Do Your Research(03 of10)
Open Image Modal
“The new generation of family traveller is not boxed in by perceived limitations, but even the most intrepid traveller needs to do their research”, warns Tom. “Life is full of unexpected twists and turns and you don’t want to arrive in your destination to find yourself stuck in the monsoon season or in the middle of an unwanted national holiday.” (credit:Alamy)
Get Physical(04 of10)
Open Image Modal
“Nothing brings a family closer than a thrilling physical challenge and in our internet age we’re seeing an increasing number of parents eager to get to get their children to ditch the computer games and explore the great outdoors. From jungle trekking in Borneo to hiking the cracks and boulders of Yosemite National Park, there are plenty of exhilarating trips to choose from these days.” (credit:Alamy)
Learn Something New(05 of10)
Open Image Modal
“For a trip that your children will truly cherish forever, why not try giving them a new perspective or introduce them to a new sport?” suggests Tom. “Experiences that can ignite new passions and hobbies.” (credit:Alamy)
Go Wild(06 of10)
Open Image Modal
“A safari is a classic option for that big family adventure but if you truly want to capture their imagination then give them a safari holiday with a twist. Swap your traditional 4x4 for a quad bike and skid across the plains of South Africa or grab a canoe and see the Big Five in action from the water in the magnificent Selinda Spillway in Botswana—there’s nothing better than ending the day hotly debating your favourite wildlife encounters of the day.” (credit:Alamy)
Find A Good Crèche(07 of10)
Open Image Modal
“There’s no need to wait until children are walking and talking to take that trip of a lifetime—there are plenty of resorts and hotels that offer spectacular kids club facilities to keep the younger travellers entertained and give you a well-deserved rest.” (credit:Alamy)
On The Road(08 of10)
Open Image Modal
“One of my favourite choices of holiday for 2013 is the quintessential road trip. For kids that are happy in a car, America’s West Coast offers the ideal combination of adventure and incredible scenery. From behind the bars of San Francisco’s Alcatraz to the majesty of Big Sur, the constant change in scenery is sure to keep the whole family entertained. You can even make the obligatory day trip to Disneyland and be back sipping cocktails in Santa Monica by sundown.” (credit:Alamy)
Something For The Weekend(09 of10)
Open Image Modal
“You don’t have to travel half way across the world to create a family holiday that will stick in the memory bank—a quick trip or city break can offer just as many rare and memorable experiences for even the most discerning (and tiny) travellers”, suggests Tom. “ For something more exotic, a quick flight to Marrakech gives kids a chance to revel in the chaos of the souk, ride camels, and try their first tagines. “ (credit:Alamy)
Time To Yourself(10 of10)
Open Image Modal
“As parents look to enrich and inspire their children’s lives with travel, they too often forget to include time to themselves in their busy schedule. A holiday should be just that and it’s important to give yourself some downtime while the kids are entertaining themselves. Indulge in a spa treatment or try an evening of wining and dining in a gourmet restaurant.” (credit:Alamy)

Before You Go