Celebrity Parents Get Real About What Having Children Is Really Like

Mess, mess, and more mess - according to 'Parenting For Idiots'.

Danny Dyer, Jonathan Ross, Frankie Boyle, Freddie Flintoff and Sally Phillips have opened up about the state of their home for the new series of Channel 4’s ‘Parenting For Idiots’.

Most parents will know only too well that having a house full of children is not a clean affair: from the baby vomit on every item of clothing, to the shards of Lego hidden in the carpet waiting to cripple you.

So how do celebrities and Instagram parents keep their lives looking quite so mess-free? The short answer is, they don’t.


The first episode, aptly titled ‘Mass Destruction’ focuses on chaos, mess, germs and public humiliation.

In the trailer, Eastenders-star Dyer is the first to divulge his recent potty training drama with two-year-old son Arty: “He’s such a little cave boy. The other day he was running around and he’s got no nappy on and he had a pork chop in his hand because he doesn’t like sitting at the table.

“So he’s having an eyelash, which means slash, hoping a chop just plotted over the potty and I thought what a legend, what a hero.”

Parenting For Idiots

BBC Radio 6 presenter Lauren Laverne revealed: “The carpet.. It was my fault why give him a jar of navy blue nail varnish? It was impressive at the radius. You couldn’t even be angry because it was like a Jackson Pollock.”

And property queen Sarah Beeny, who has four sons, revealed that she has been dealing with nits in her house: “Years ago, one of my children got nits and Graham [her husband] got them out with a nit comb and he squashed it and my son was about five and said: ‘Don’t do that he’s my friend’.”

This we can’t wait to see.

Parenting For Idiots, will air Thursday 2 Feb at 10pm.