Yesterday, according to Nigel Farage, the UK took a step towards “becoming a proper country again”.
No, we didn’t curb foodbank use, see a rise in the value of Sterling or negotiate a trade deal with the EU better than the one we already have - we got blue passports.
All made possible by a £490 million contract to redesign and produce a new version.
Upon the announcement of the news people asserted their new-found individuality and national identity by lauding the move in some of the strongest terms imaginable.
1) We’ll take these guys up on their bet but we’ll hold out to see if Sterling bottoms out anymore first.
2) A whopping 17 million Brits have never even known a blue passport, never mind missed one.
“Bog off burgundy, welcome back blue, you were missed!”
3) This could be sarcasm but then again...
“For the last 30 years all I have dreamt of is having a blue passport, nothing else that is going on in the whole wide world matters.”
“I`ve always felt a sense of shame on having to have an EU passport it made me feel like a state member and not a free man in a sovereign nation.”
5) Puns, all the best puns.
“Protect our savereintey! Change the word 'passport' to 'passpOURt'. Damn you Europe!”
6) Bit of advice Mr Welshman, do not ever test this theory.
“Still have my old blue one. It survived floating in a duffel bag full of water inside Niagara Falls and would likely take a bullet for me. So welcome back old blue.”
7) Well this is sinister.
“We can have burgundy passport burning ceremonies.”
8) Don’t tell Shoeman that one of the three companies currently bidding for the contract to make the new blue passport includes a manufacturer based in Germany.
“Let's hope it's printed in the UK, we've got to start giving work to this country now and buying more things made in the UK.”
9) TrueBrit will have plenty of time to practice his suave lines as he queues to pas through.
“Whip it out at Passport Control.............My name is 'Bond'............'Premium Bond'”
10) “It wasn’t just about immigrants.”
“Doesn't matter what colour it is it will still be handed out to immigrants, what we need to do is kick all the foreigners out and don't let any more in, may has done nothing what the people voted for I voted out because I'm sick of all the foreing s..t that's here”
11) Change our currency to what?
“Curse you Europe! Let's get our sovereignty back! Time to resurrect our Imperial System! Time to change our money!”