12 Stages Of Doing The School Run

Has everyone brushed their teeth?

Everyone talks about childbirth being difficult, but all parents really know the pinnacle of parenting pain is getting to the playground on time with your child wearing both shoes.

Someone save us...

1. Your alarm going off.

Thinking about the golden days when you only had to get yourself ready.

2. Getting the kids out of bed.

As the mornings get darker, this gets even more fun.

3. Stopping them from creeping back under the duvet.

Don’t turn your back even for a second.

4. Having to explain daily why uniform is not optional.

Only mummy gets to wear pyjamas to the playground.

5. Doing a breath test to check everyone has brushed their teeth.

Obviously you have emergency gum in the car but no one needs to know that.

6. Spending ten minutes finding the second shoe.

Until you trip over it and break your ankle.

7. And then the car keys.

We’re sleeping with them under our pillow from now on.

8. Forgetting the lunch and having to go back in the house.

Keep the car running kids.

9. Being told PE has been moved and they actually needed their kit today.

But obviously only when you’re half way to school.

10. Praying for no traffic.

Tomorrow you’re getting the bus.

11. Trying to think of a good excuse for why you are late again.

Please don’t make me fill in the tardy registration sheet.

12. Promising to get up 10 minutes earlier tomorrow to avoid a repeat of the chaos.

When can we go back to bed?

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