'You can't bore people into buying your product, you can only interest them into buying it.' ... In today's world, is advertising interesting? ... Are all interestings equal? Or are some more interesting than others? How interesting does an interesting have to be to get noticed?
What should worry the mandarins of the game in its country of birth, however, is the complete lack of purpose and direction of the current team. The immediate task for England is simple - do not allow India to win any more tests in the series, and win at least one for itself.
On paper, a group of ageing middle class men wittering on for eight hours about a sport where very little can happen for five days straight doesn't sound like radio gold, however the BBC has turned it into an art form.
Under such tremendous scrutiny, the pressure on Cook to perform, both personally and as a leader - a role for which his insular personality seems ill-suited - may be too great. Perhaps, in the modern era, the job of England cricket captain really is impossible.
The recent Ofsted report that too many state-school pupils are denied the chance to take part in competitive sport is a worrying trend and a call to action for all of us who care passionately about school sport.
My dad died four years ago this August. I often think of him and especially so when important dates approach. Oddly, I think of him most around Fathers Day. I say oddly because I anticipated that his birthday, or the anniversary of his death, would impact me more. It doesn't
Poor old Jonathan Agnew, the BBC's once universally loved voice of cricket. It would be wrong to say he has failed these last six months to hold the ECB to account, because that would imply he had tried to...
Embrace failure. The taste of it makes our palate for life far more mature. It is the essential ingredient for success. Although, just for good measure, I have my fingers crossed too, just like Moyes and Moores.
The ECB, whether it likes it or not, is not North Korea. It cannot disappear people without explanation, nor can it lie to the public about maladies afflicting key apparatchiks without facing repercussion of any sort.
One book I don't regret asking for last Christmas was the auto-biography of Ricky Hatton, War and Peace. Though not primarily for Boxing reasons, since his last book covered his fighting career all the way to the Mayweather fight, and since then he's only boxed four times.
Kevin Pietersen is England's greatest ever run scorer. Roy Keane was arguably one of Manchester United's greatest ever players. Lewis Hamilton, was the whizz-kid extraordinaire. Three iconic sportsmen - but none of them are team players.
What the ECB did was wrong. Questions were answered, and I guess they still are, but they've done a disservice to someone that put 110% into England cricket. Regardless of the reports, the text messages, hands down he would be on that team sheet, for his sheer brilliance.
Getting thrashed is something. Getting thrashed and learning and changing nothing is unforgivable. So what lessons can we take from England's 5-0 drubbing down under..
Two of my favourite speeches come from the late 11th Century. They read as match reports for England's disastrous Ashes performance; they offer some clues and advice for the beleagured captain, Alastair Cook.
Yet for England, a perfect occasion for experimentation with a view to the future presents itself in the summer of 2014 with the decidedly less intimidating task of a home test series against a depleted Sri Lankan side. The point should be made clearly: badly needed is reform and refinement, not revolution.
I doubt Michael Cimino has ever watched a game of cricket in his life - nevertheless the Oscar-winning director who imploded in a fireball of arrogance, sycophancy and self-obsessive control-freakery more than three decades ago is the perfect mentor for England's beleaguered cricket captain, Alistair Cook.