I think we can now officially call this the 'stalemate election'. Even the introduction of Boris has failed to break the shackles. The two main parties have been wheeling out all their 'big guns' in the last couple of weeks to no effect. And who do they have left? Does anyone at Tory HQ even have the mobile number for John Selwyn Gummer?
So far during this election campaign, debates on issues like the economy, the NHS or immigration have been impossible to avoid. In contrast, practically everyone has ignored a pledge buried back on the 64th page of the Labour Party's manifesto, given little more than a paragraph, which could have major implications for the future of democracy in Britain.
This is it. After what's felt like an eternity, the general election is finally getting underway. Everyone who plans on voting has been registered, party manifestos have been launched and would-be politicians are producing an endless stream of tough-talking soundbites.
My dad is in maximum-security prison after an unreliable career in armed robbery. He already served ten-years and was finally promoted to an open prison - you know the ones - the kind we reserve for our white-collar criminals like celebrity politicians Jeffrey Archer and Jonathan Aitken. Annoyingly my dad didn't write a best seller in the last few months of his stretch...
The rise of food banks in 21st Century Britain is nothing short of a disgrace. Today's figures from the Trussell Trust confirm that in David Cameron's Britain more than a million people have to rely on food banks each year. This is the Tory plan that David Cameron says is working.
They say our economy and system of government are failing people. But it strikes me that the party, which according to poles has 34% of the public vote, have an economic plan that might 'fail people' in just the same way.
Many pubs are important parts of the communities they serve, and every pub is different. If a pub closes its doors forever then its distinctiveness, atmosphere and character are lost forever. Just because there may be another pub down the road doesn't mean it will be an adequate replacement.
Pick up a copy of The Sun in England today and you can read the sort of Labour-bashing front page that Britain's biggest tabloid newspaper has been doing pretty well for months. "Slave Labour" tells the story of a would-be MP paying interns less than the minimum wage.
With the manifestos out of the way and as we head towards the final stretch of the election campaigns culminating with the General Election, political deadlock remains in place. Neither of the two main parties have gained the upper hand with polls suggesting a very tight race to the finish line.
It is clear that the Green Party have made unattainable promises to young people; abolishing tuition fees and better employment prospects are just the first few of a very long list. The policies right at the heart of their manifesto promise only one thing - inconceivable damage to the future of young people
The heat of the election campaign this week gave way to a bit more light, with the publication of the manifestos of the major political parties. Rather than piecing together the parties' respective positions on development from speeches, blog posts or remarks in Parliament, we now have a formal written statement of what they would seek to achieve if successful in their bid to form the next Government. So what did we learn?
In the past week, we've seen four new election manifestos - but with both Labour and the Tories struggling to make any kind of decisive poll gain, some old ideas are rearing their heads. The Tories, failing to achieve the desperately-awaited 'crossover' in the polls, are very rapidly ditching their stern economic message of 'tough choices' and attempting to resurrect the groaning corpse of the 'big society.'
The Queen of Selfies may be embarking on a new phase of her life but rest assured, Karen Danczuk will return to politics and will be looking to shake up the establishment. They've got five years to get prepared.
The fundamental truth that runs through Labour's manifesto and the Green Plan we publish today is that Britain succeeds when working people succeed. Our economic success cannot be built by eroding our natural environment any more than it can by eroding wages or living standards.
Every time I go online at the moment, I'm slapped in the face with some infographic or digital countdown clock indicating how long I have until I cast the one vote that will help shape Britain's political landscape for the next five years.
So you say you want a revolution? Well get to the back of the line. I joined the queue some twenty odd years ago, like most as angry teens, and trust me, I'm nowhere near the front.