Forget about the millions missing Top Gear, the BBC are expecting record viewing figures for another programme next Monday (March 30): a made-for-television film about the life of Noah, with David Threlfall playing the lead role and moving from shameless to righteous.
While Clarkson's true-to-form casual attitude to the 'fracas' and bravado to the subsequent BBC action of suspending him might give the impression that no damage has really been done, PR-wise, many media experts would disagree.
Never will we find ourselves "not being able to make the video player work" because we have a grasp on how to interact with menus, cursors, downloads & searches. Our knowledge is ingrained, adaptable and transferable.
What should have been a personal moment between two people, that could have been sorted out to the satisfaction of everyone concerned, in private, has been blown up to a story so huge that you could see it from the Space Station.
In almost any other industry or organisation, Clarkson's recent behaviour would have constituted as several incidents of gross misconduct. While there isn't a universal definition of this the government advises that the definition includes actions like theft, intoxication, fighting or physical abuse and offensive behaviour including discrimination.
After leaving school at 16, with no notable grades, I fell into a career as an electrician. I spent over a decade working on the tools, but I always knew my heart was not in it and I dreamed of a career as a journalist...
Irrespective of what the 'fracas' involved, one gets the impression that a certain sector of the BBC has been gunning for Clarkson's head for many years. And why? Because he simply conducts himself onscreen in the same manner as the viewers. By being real. By being himself.
The present system of the BBC Trust is out of date. It is wrong to consider that an organisation be run by a trust as well as by a company that it is supposed to manage the business. It would seem perfectly normal to understand that the licence holders are no different than shareholders.
As licence-fee payers, shouldn't we have a say in the artist and song that represents our country in an international competition? As consistently one of the highest-rated programes on television in the country in the whole year, shouldn't the lead-up programme be shown on a mainstream channel (rather than hidden behind the Red Button)?
Has my birth country become such a merciless society where most men don't acknowledge the existence of women, or if they do its only as an object to be bullied, groped, raped, beaten, tortured and killed?
Two days before my daughter's first birthday, my to-do list read like this. 1) Cake. 2) Presents. 3) Dig out sagging pre-pregnancy swimming costume and go for a dip in the local pool, the whole thing filmed in close-up with a strategically positioned bright light highlighting every normally-hidden flaw.
Full credit must be given to BBC for their decision to air Storyville: India's Daughter on Friday, ahead of schedule, in response to the lunacy displayed yesterday in India's Parliament, and by the attempts to ban the screening of the film, not just in India, but absurdly beyond the country's borders as well.
The Committee suggests that the licence fee should be extended to cover catch-up TV and that some BBC services might be provided on subscription. But beyond this it recommends only "careful thought".
Without the license fee, the BBC wouldn't have been able to establish the web services leaving other broadcasters in the shade - my service users would consider that a reason for keeping the fee, not abolishing it, and like any business owner I should put them first, surely?
I start to think about the writer I want to be. Maybe I'll get really good at Twitter. I could become one of those writers who has their finger on the pulse and can talk about Newsnight and the latest series of Ex on the Beach, Yeah, maybs. I turn the wifi back on.
With the greatest of respect, TV fiction is like other fiction types. It is escapism. It suspends the boundaries of reality. That is, after all the only possible reason the writers on Eastenders get away with entire families living in large houses in London, whilst earning no money for themselves.