With the media and social networking sites in full Royal Baby frenzy now seems as good a time as any to think about parenting. I find myself at that age where more and more of my friends are becoming parents. After a while you begin to notice patterns in parenting emerging based on how people discuss and portray their family life online.
Since the announcement of a royal baby, the nation has been counting down the months, weeks and days until the arrival of our future king. Well finally the wait is over! And what better way to celebrate the birth of the little prince than by making your own POM Royale cocktail!
In what can only be described as adding insult to injury, the Ham & High reported a badly injured cyclist being taken to St Mary's Hospital, "where the Duchess of Cambridge is due to give birth". The bizarrely inappropriate royal reference has since been removed from the article.
ay is believed to have dropped a tidy sum on a whopping blue diamond ring, in honour of their daughter's name. It's a new trend that celebs are adopting, so when I suggested I needed a "push present"... It's a growing phenomenon in the US, and with the birth of Prince Wills and Kate's first baby imminent, I'm left to wonder whether she will get one too.
You've got to feel for the Cambridge's. (Not the global media attention or the world and it's grandparents-to-be. Not that bit). No, I mean the waiting bit.
The most significant influence in recent years has been Kate Middleton whose impeccable fashion sense has been instrumental in boosting takings in British High Street tills, inspiring optimism in a flagging clothing industry. The Reiss fashion chain, for example, is reported to have increased its fortune by £5 million to £130 million after Kate wore its creations.
Prince William and Kate Middleton's rumoured due date, July 13, is fast approaching. Being a first-time parent is difficult for everyone, but with all their royal responsibilities, they'll likely need some extra help...
As the most famous father in the world, he'll have the power to influence thousands - if not millions - of families for the better. You don't need to be a flag-waving Royalist to get excited about an opportunity like that.
A new baby trumps any guests, even royal ones. All special treatment is diverted to the newest member of the family and guests must respect this and accept that standards in the home you are visiting may not be what they usually are. So Your Majesty do not be surprised if you glance around the room and see William's underpants drying on the radiators.
The explosion of confetti blocked my view of the ceremony for a wee while...a cumulus cloud of white and blue."I name you: The Royal Princess," declared the ship's Godmother, the Duchess of Cambridge. The cord was cut, releasing the blue ribbon festooned bottle of Moët & Chandon Impérial Champagne which smashed on the side of the vessel's hull.
The collective worship of millions - even billions - across the planet is bound to send you a tiny bit peculiar. Maybe that's what prompted John Lennon to say that the Beatles were 'more popular than Jesus'. Could it be? Is Justin Bieber bigger than God?
With the Duchess of Cambridge now in her final trimester, the UK is anticipating the arrival of a new future monarch this July. There has never been a better time to give birth. Really, I'm not just offering that as a platitude, the customs and advice relating to pregnancy and birth in the past make for horrific reading. Of course, the lack of hygiene and gynaecological understanding caused untold suffering but setting mortality rates aside, midwives and the fashionable male accouchers of the past had some strange ideas about what was best for their patients.
There are a lot of people betting a lot of money on the name of the future Royal Baby - and after considerable research, I have worked out how to beat the bookies. No, not just beat them. Absolutely cane them. We hope.
The result is positive. My partner and I are thrilled. Tears prick our cheeks and we embrace each other as we revel in the joy of our future. I tell my mum and my best friend. Everyone is thrilled. I started to get sick...
The main reason, in fact, the only reason why the BBC has chosen to prioritise the royals, throughout the Duchess's pregnancy, throughout her marriage to Prince William, throughout the jubilee, is because it is pandering to the right-wing media, of which it is absolutely and permanently petrified.
Some matters are simply contentious. Sometimes you're never going to get it right. The politics of the Middle East, for example. Whether Scotland should or shouldn't become independent in 2014. Oh, and whether the term 'lady' is outmoded and derogatory or exactly what most women aspire to.