You are new, so no matter what your experience beforehand everyone will assume you are utterly crap at telling jokes to people. This can be frustrating when you are trying to assure everyone you are the UK's answer to Sarah Silverman with a bit of Lee Evans thrown in *cough*. The answer? Well, my answer, is to embrace it.
Immediately I began to draw a fair amount of attention, I could see people sniggering, actually sniggering at me. I tried to act normal whilst flexing biceps and breathing in. People looked up from books and stared, a group of young girls looked at me then hid their mouths behind conspiring palms... "What the hell is wrong with these people? ... What's so damn funny?"
It wasn't until the end of the shift that one of the girls I was working with let it slip that I wouldn't be getting paid for my time. Yes, that is correct. Aside from a few pounds in tips, I wasn't getting compensated or my time. I might as well just have spent the evening engaging in my normal routine of obsessive cleaning and reality television.
Yes TfL has started letting you bus it even if you have only one penny's worth of credit. And sure, if you're lucky enough to have a contactless debit card, you're probably fine. But let's face it: at some point, most of us are going to want to get a night bus, having run into negative Oyster balance. And then what, eh?
If you ask Twitter for funny women, you'll get no shortage of answers. They're out there, so there is no excuse for your list excluding them like a social underclass. Without too much ado then, here they are. In alphabetical order, because I really only use the pretence of democracy as a filtering system, this isn't a popularity contest, here are 10 of the funniest women on Twitter...