downing street
One to compete with the "ambushed with cake" excuse.
Cressida Dick just announced that the police will be looking into "a number" of the alleged Downing Street parties.
"Ok fine. Let’s not call it a party. Let’s call it an illegal gathering."
Josephine Booth wrote to the prime minister during lockdown: "I am staying at home because you asked us to."
The top civil servant is expected to reveal the findings of her investigation into Downing Street's alleged parties this week.
Claims of islamophobia and blackmail, along with the partygate inquiry, have hit No.10 in recent weeks.
The monarch refused to bend lockdown just for Prince Philip's funeral last year.
"I’ve got a reputation for being a party girl anyway, but in this situation the answer is ‘no’ – you set an example, and you live by that example."
Armed forces minister James Heappey even admitted that "millions" of voters will not believe Boris Johnson’s defence.
It was kind of his job to know.