Alpha-dating is a way to put the excitement, mystery and fun back into your relationship by going week by week (or month by month) and taking it in turns to go through the alphabet, coming up with a different date beginning with each letter of the alphabet. For example A could be for archery, get out Cupid 's bow and arrow and put the love back into your life!
No one can say I haven't worked at my relationships. I've forgiven when needed, been patient when pushed, determined when others would walk away, and always understood that this type of effort was vital to relationships. I just never thought I might have to apply this type of vigor to my friendships.
Many people find that when they are in a committed long-term relationship their sex lives can, over time, become perfunctory, routine and habitual, with sex 'performed' at certain times and ways each week. However, all it takes is a little thought and effort to make a difference and begin to improve your sex life.
The beauty of being single is that you have a lot of time to think. After a lot of thinking, I've noticed that I don't want to 'get married' - I want to fall in love and build a life with someone who feels the same way. If we happen to have a big party and a piece of paper to go with that, then great.
There is a lot I have discovered since you took your own life. Firstly, while there is no hierarchy of death where one is better than the other, it's safe to say that living a long life is at the top while a short one is at the bottom. I don't know where suicide sits, but it's safe to say, it makes other people REALLY uncomfortable. I was advised against telling people how you died. And in the initial bizarreness of picking your burial plot and coffin (and being asked whether Robert was an eco-friendly man), I erred on the side of caution. But by this 30th day, I have realised when the worst, most devastating thing possible happens, you lose the energy to maintain any artifice.
There are other advantages to having alone time too: being able to read in bed at night for as long as I like, repeatedly watching Vikings (if I can't see my husband's beardy face and tattoos I might as well enjoy those of Rollo and Ragnar), not having to watch Arsenal, not having to wade through his clothes on the floor to get into bed, not being woken at 6.15 by his alarm every day.
I'm not talking about one night stands and I'm not talking about a major porn-style session. I'm talking about the feeling of acceptance. From one person to another. Sex is something that brings two people together in a way like no other. And to have sex after surgery for a stoma is a big thing both mentally and emotionally.