Lost in Translation - Do You Speak Toddler?

Rachel McDougall | Posted 01.09.2015 | UK Parents
Rachel McDougall

While both my kids have pretty good language skills for their ages, there are a few things that I'm still struggling to help them to understand. Perhaps I need to learn to speak toddler? Despite my best and most patient attempts, the following concepts are proving particularly tricky for them to comprehend.

The Parenting Rollercoaster

Sarah Turner | Posted 25.08.2015 | UK Parents
Sarah Turner

Christ alive I've never known a rollercoaster of emotions quite like the last three and a half years. Gone are the 'good days' and 'bad days'. Days are less easy to emotionally rank now. Sometimes I encounter the full spectrum of emotions in the same day.

Eight Times Having a Toddler Was Like 'Lord of the Flies'

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 25.08.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

Hands up who's read Lord of the Flies? (Hand down, Dad, I read your school copy of the book: two pages of the whole book were annotated.) Those who did read the whole book: has anyone noticed their house has gone just a little bit Lord of the Flies since having a toddler?

Getting Ready for Work Alongside the Toddler

Lisa Cornwell | Posted 18.08.2015 | UK Parents
Lisa Cornwell

As a working mum, I have a specific time frame in the morning to get ready and out of the door in time to get the toddler to wherever he needs to be and me to the train station and into work on time.

Seven Signs You're a Mum in Need of a Holiday

Zeena Moolla | Posted 04.08.2015 | UK Parents
Zeena Moolla

Since becoming a mum, is your idea of a break a solo trip to the loo and enough time to cut your toenails? Do you feel positively Mediterranean slinging a bit of feta in your shopping trolley, and having a siesta (or rather passing out from exhaustion), on the couch while the kids nap? It could be you are suffering from a well-known condition called MINOAH - Mum In Need Of A Holiday.

How the Toddler Uses Her Words to Help Her Baby Sister

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 04.08.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

When The Baby's noises show an emotion, particularly a negative one, The Toddler will usually get involved. She will report The Baby's feelings to Mummy: 'The Baby is sad.' She will offer reassurance to The Baby: 'Don't worry, the Baby!'

Can Living the Dream Actually Be a Nightmare?

Tara Mestre | Posted 02.08.2015 | UK Lifestyle
Tara Mestre

We bought the van, we spent the money on repairs, we packed up our goods, we said goodbye to family and we boarded a ferry to France. EEEEK! We've been away for a month now and it's only now that we are getting used to be being around each other 24/7. The first three weeks were HARD! And I mean really HARD!!

Playing the Game of 'Shh'

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 30.07.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

Silly Mummy is miming rooting around in the invisible bag: 'Look, The Toddler, what's this Mummy has here? Mummy has something here for you. Let Mummy just find it...ah, yes, here it is! Look: it's SHH!' Silly Mummy pulls the 'shh' finger out of the bag.

Surviving Soft Play

Sarah Turner | Posted 30.07.2015 | UK Parents
Sarah Turner

With indoor soft play, survival is all about mental preparation. You need to be prepared for the shit that is about to get real.

How Bob The Builder And Wendy Can Teach Your Kids About Sex

The Huffington Post UK | Amy Packham | Posted 29.07.2015 | UK Parents

Sex education isn't a topic you're likely to bring up with to your kids until the topic starts floating around in the classroom. But a United Nati...

Responses To 'Why Does Your Toddler Cry?' Sums Up Our Parenting Woes

The Huffington Post UK | Amy Packham | Posted 27.07.2015 | UK Parents

Toddler logic would baffle even the scientists behind the Hadron Collider, let alone the average parent. But, as we know too well - it is both mys...

Five and a Half Ways the Baby Is a Big Disappointment to the Toddler

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 24.07.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

It should be made clear at the outset that The Toddler loves The Baby. The Toddler is very proud of The Baby. She likes to show The Baby to anyone and everyone: 'My sis!' Nonetheless, The Baby is, on occasion, a big disappointment to The Toddler; and here are five and a half reasons why.

Dad Catches Toddler 'Drink Driving' In Her Toy Car, Pretends To Arrest Her

The Huffington Post UK | Sophie Brown | Posted 23.07.2015 | UK Parents

A video of a toddler who has curbed her toy car on a snow mount after 'drinking and driving' has become a viral hit. The girl's father slowly appr...

Outrage As Down's Syndrome Toddler Is Photographed In Washing Machine 'For A Laugh'

Huffington Post UK | Sara C Nelson | Posted 22.07.2015 | UK

A mother is facing an outcry after posting a picture of a toddler with Down’s Syndrome shut inside a washing machine on Facebook. Courtney Stewa...

Today I Paraded a Poo Around My House

Olivia Siegl | Posted 20.07.2015 | UK Parents
Olivia Siegl

Never EVER did I think I would be so excited about another human taking a dump, but my oh my the sound of poo hitting plastic has made this potty training mums year!

'I'll Tell You What, Mummy': Five of the Funniest Things the Toddler Said Last Week

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 20.07.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

'No. And Mummy not big girl. No stairs!' Oh dear. The Baby, The Toddler and Silly Mummy are all not big enough to go down the stairs. Well, this is a dilemma. On with the post from the top of the stairs, where we shall remain until we are big girls.

Mediocre Mum

Jennifer Hill | Posted 17.07.2015 | UK Parents
Jennifer Hill

There's a bit of a trend at the moment about being open and honest when it comes to parenting. Brags about things we don't do with our kids or epic parenting fails are becoming more common than the wonderful things we all do.

Mum Posts Genius Response To Strangers Asking Nosy Questions About Twins

The Huffington Post UK | Amy Packham | Posted 14.07.2015 | UK Parents

If you're a parent of twins, you might be able to relate to the hilarious sign a mother temporarily attached to her twin's pram. Annie Nolan, 26, ...

Thief Snatched Toys From Ill Toddler's Pram

SWNS | Murray Spooner | Posted 14.07.2015 | UK Parents

A thief snatched toys from a child's pram, which had been bought to cheer up the toddler during a series of hospital treatments. Sharon Mitchell, 4...

Play a Game of Guess What Film the Toddler Is Talking About

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 13.07.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

The Toddler has taken a sudden interest in watching films. She has not, however, taken an interest in what films are actually called. The Toddler has developed a couple of alternative methods for identifying the film she wants to watch.

The Wonder Years

Emma Porcelli | Posted 13.07.2015 | UK Parents
Emma Porcelli

No, I am not talking about The Wonder Years series on Channel 4 with Fred Savage when we were little... I am talking about the 'Terrible Two's.' I am calling them 'The Wonder Years', as I wonder how you ever survive them?!

Five and a Half Things the Baby Has Learnt From the Toddler

Lucy Gaskin | Posted 13.07.2015 | UK Parents
Lucy Gaskin

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a toddler in possession of a coaster must be in want of a baby's head to put it on.* The Baby has learnt that a wide variety of objects will be placed on her head and declared a 'hat'.

Young Frozen Fan Tries To Convince Dad To Steal Giant Elsa

Parentdish UK | Keith Kendrick | Posted 09.07.2015 | UK Parents

How did this dad react when his toddler daughter attempted to "steal" a Frozen doll from a shop? "Let it go!" (Obviously). As we all know, Elsa ...

Secret Diary of a Threenager

Rachel McDougall | Posted 13.07.2015 | UK Parents
Rachel McDougall

Dear Diary...The Mother has been looking far too confident and relaxed lately, I need to remind her who's actually in charge around here. No more Little Miss Nice. Over the course of one day I will bring this woman to her knees, with my simple Eight Point Plan.

Potty Training For Dummies

Katy Wright | Posted 13.07.2015 | UK Parents
Katy Wright

Announce with great excitement that it's time to be a big boy/girl to your child. Jump up and down in the air like Tigger on speed as you whip open a Primark bag stuffed with brand new big boy/girl pants.