Before I begin the account of my first festival experience, it might be a good time to explain why my 28-year-old, party-adoring, find-any-excuse-to-drink-before-midday self has taken so long to get pitched. You see, I thought they were all about the music.
Yes there was amazing music, yes there were unbelievable djs, yes the food was incredible. But for me, what made my first festival so brilliant, were these moments of 'festival love'. The sense of community that seemed to flow through and unite everyone there. We were all having the same experience.
It's the pinnacle of summer. The final bank holiday hurrah for the U.K. A chance for many to bid farewell to their barbeques, paddling pools and take their tops off in public one last time. For over 150,000 people though it's the annual celebration of getting rowdy in a field to one of the biggest bills of music in the world at Reading and Leeds Festivals. What is often forgotten is that it's been this way for over 30 years.
He recoils with a faintly amused expression on his face, shrugs, then glances around for an appropriate piece of hardware with which to impale me. He seizes a nearby spare mic stand, and so begins a Tom and Jerry style chase around the backstage area, me leaping over flight cases and knocking guitars to the floor in my efforts to escape... My tour bus dreams are getting stranger.
The International Space Station is making bright, low passes through the late summer night sky this month. On a cool, clear night, I watched its smooth, stately progress from west to east - seemingly just at the top end of my street.
The main music festival site at Sines was within the walls of the castle, the former home of the 15th-century explorer Vasco da Gama. But before things kicked off there, we enjoyed three days of more intimate gigs at an outdoor stage in the main square of the small fishing village of Porto Covo.
There is one situation in which an encore is definitely not such a good idea. Frowned upon, in fact, by just about everyone in the venue apart from the audience cheering for it. And that situation is a festival. For a festival to be a success, it must run on time.
31) Spitfires with fireworks coming off their wings that loop in the sky to form a GIANT HEART from their trails as the light fades from the sky: actual best thing ever. 32) A tiny flying-machine thing sprinkling blue lights over your head like something out of WALL-E, blimey, I mean, look at that.
This time last month, I was halfway through three weeks working at Glastonbury Festival. This meant that I was able to see the 'Early' week, final build up of all the stages and areas, as well as the Show Week in which the market vendors and last staging equipment poured in, joined by 175,000 others from Wednesday onwards.
At Victoria Park he recognised that not everyone in attendance was a Nas fan and many weren't even born when the album was released. Here he said ''I'm Nas for those that done know me, I'm the one that said hip-hop was dead!
A London weekend festival, Lovebox has been described as "an annual love letter to the Capital" and I couldn't agree more. As usual it took part in Victoria Park, delivering its eclectic mix of musical genres. This year's headliners included Hercules and Love Affair, Nas, Maverick Sabre, Banks, MIA and Bonobo.
It's not that I don't like music. I like music, loads. All different kinds of music. It's not even that I don't like camping. I have voluntarily, repeatedly, slept in a field without a tent in February with the Army Reserve. Festival camping is veritable luxury compared to that. You don't have to poo in a bush. You don't have to eat cold yellow soup of an indeterminate flavour out of a foil bag.
Yet as the festival was reborn in 2014 there was an air of optimism that hung over the event. An atmosphere of genuine friendliness and camaraderie permeated all corners of the festival site and it was all down to a line up made to please that did exactly what it said on the tin.
Set in a magical ancient walled town of Massa Martana in sunny Umbria, the inaugural Umbria Rock festival is set to be a weekend to remember, and I am thrilled to have been asked to work with them to help make the first year a big success.
We all know she's had plastic surgery, wears wigs, and has spent a fortune on her looks, as she so often quotes 'it takes a lot of money to look this cheap!'... The next thing you'll know, there will be a degree course in how to build a brand the Dolly Parton way.
When I first went to Glastonbury I was 22: it was the year I graduated from uni; there was a heatwave; I saw Stevie Wonder, Muse, Florence and the Machine; and I hadn't quite realised how shit the job market was going to be. In short: I had the time of my life. But this year, plagued with ever-increasing overdraft - a trip to Glasto costs between £600-700 - I made the regrettable decision to give it a miss. (Note to self: don't do that again.)