With Britain’s knife crime crisis dominating the news, Brexit has fallen off the front pages. But behind the scenes, politicians have continued in their increasingly desperate attempts to secure a workable exit deal by March 29.
But all of that is about to change. On Monday – with just 18 days to go until Brexit – MPs will be thrown headfirst into a week in the Commons that will surely be remembered for years to come.
From the second meaningful vote on the prime minister’s deal to an opportunity for MPs to take no-deal off the table (and the chancellor’s spring statement thrown in there for good luck), it’s going to be edge-of-your-seat stuff. (Sort of.)
But before you leap head-first into the best political drama Westminster has to offer, here are all the details on Brexit proceedings you might have missed this week.
Geoffrey Cox’s codpiece
With the clock ticking down until the UK leaves the EU, May sent velvet-voiced attorney general Geoffrey Cox to Brussels in a bid to renegotiate the backstop.
The PM and her team are trying to secure changes to the insurance policy to prevent a hard border between Ireland and Northern Ireland to reassure Tory Brexiteers that the UK cannot be trapped in it – and by default the customs union – indefinitely by the EU.
But as you may expect given that the EU has ardently and repeatedly said it will not reopen negotiations on the backstop, Cox’s trip did not go well.
Speaking to reporters on Wednesday morning as he headed back to London, the barrister said the UK and the EU had exchanged “robust, strong views”, but were “into the meat of the matter now”.
Long story short – the two sides fundamentally disagree and Cox’s meeting didn’t change that.
That’s not the worst of it though.
Telling MPs in the Commons on Thursday that talks with the EU were ongoing in a bid to break the Brexit impasse, Cox inexplicably started talking about his “codpiece”. (A pouch attached to the crotch of men’s trousers in the 16th century, if you didn’t know – and why would you?)
Telling the House his attempt to change the backstop had been dubbed “Cox’s codpiece”, the Torridge and West Devon MP said: “It has become known as Cox’s codpiece and it is my job to ensure everything in it is in full working order.”
As if Brexit wasn’t stomach-churning enough already.
How a no-deal Brexit could hit farmers
Business secretary Greg Clark came under fire this week after the government revealed plans to slash tariffs by as much as 90% if the UK crashes out of the EU without a deal.
(If you – like 90% of the population – aren’t up-to-date on your GCSE business lingo, tariffs are border taxes charged on imports. They make foreign goods more expensive in a bid to protect UK produce from global competition.)
Drastically cutting tariffs would lower prices for shoppers – a big plus at a time when the government fears inflation could explode if there’s no Brexit deal. But critics argue it could also leave British farmers and producers very vulnerable, decimating certain industries.
While some imports, such as cars, beef, lamb and dairy, would remain subject to levies to protect sensitive industries, it would mark the single biggest liberalisation of the British economy in history – and people are seriously worried.
Labour MP Anna Turley tweeted: “Is the government giving up all pretence of Britain being able to make anything any more? This will open the door to floods of imports from steel to ceramics.”
However, business secretary Greg Clark insisted that new tariff schedules would only be published after the second meaningful vote if it was clear the UK would be leaving the EU without a deal.
Well, that’s… reassuring. (Anyone else now seriously worrying about something they didn’t know existed give minutes ago?)
Spreadsheet Phil’s post-Brexit warning
It wasn’t just Clark dropping bombshells about what a no-deal Brexit Britain could look like. Chancellor Philip Hammond revealed that there would be no extra money for public services if MPs vote to leave the EU without a deal on Tuesday.
Hammond – or ‘Spreadsheet Phil’ as he’s known on the mean streets of Westminster – said that money would need to be spent supporting the economy through “inevitable disruption’ if the UK crashed out of the EU.
“If that money is spent on dealing with the disruption of a no-deal exit, it can’t be spent on policing, on social care, on schools, on higher education, on defence.”
Glad that we’ve got that cleared up…