Jeremy Corbyn Wants To Abolish The Army, Apparently

8 New Story Suggestions For The Sun After Their Latest Corbyn Scoop
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Keen Sun readers will have seen the paper's front page this morning, breaking an important story surrounding Jeremy Corbyn's apparent intention to abolish the British Army.

Despite the sensationalist headline, the source of the story buried in a feature on page four turns out to be an off the cuff remark three years ago in which Corbyn said "it would be wonderful if we could abolish the Army".

A further bit of digging leads us to The Sun's website, which is the only place to find the full quote:

"Wouldn’t it be wonderful if every politician around the world instead of taking pride in the size of their armed forces did what the people of Costa Rica have done and abolished the army and took pride in the fact that they don’t have an army, and that their country is near the top of the global peace index. Surely that is the way we should be going forward."

That "chance would be a fine thing" attitude towards achieving world peace seems to be the source of The Sun's attack, so here's a few other suggestions for the folks who wrote that headline:

Other Jeremy Corbyn Front Pages For The Sun (LIST)
(01 of08)
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"AND THEN HE ATE THEM."
(02 of08)
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"Adult man not married? Oooooh."
(03 of08)
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"He also reportedly once said 'Graham Norton is not very funny'."
(04 of08)
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"WILL HE STOP AT NOTHING?"
(05 of08)
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"Labour's new leader is said to have turned down black coffee on multiple occasions and even has white walls in his home."
(06 of08)
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"The MP once had a stopover at Moscow airport so was in Russia for TWO WHOLE HOURS. What could he have done in that time? We speculate he may have had a secret meeting with the Communist Party about bringing Britain to its knees."
(07 of08)
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"A man in a pub once asked Jeremy Corbyn which team he supported, but was met with disdain from the football hating Labour leader. Does this mean Comrade Jez wants to destroy everything we love? Yes. Yes it does."
(08 of08)
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"Jihad Jeremy????"

Or, one tweeter had some other ideas: