Errrm, that'll be seagulls. Literally.
Couldn't have happened to a nicer chap etc, etc.
Poor old Chris came under attack from a group of the birds as he sunned himself on the beach in Miami.
That'll teach him to share his chips.
It seems even our feathered friends aren't big fans of the singer. Maybe they've caught wind of the rumour that he's teamed up with his ex Rihanna - who he was convicted of assaulting three years ago - on a remix of her track Birthday Cake.
Yes, really.
News of the collaboration comes hot on the heels of several sightings of Ri-Ri and Brown partying at the same Hollywood club, leading to speculation that a reconciliation could be on the cards.
Let's hope Rihanna - currently in the UK for London Fashion Week and the Brit Awards - finds herself a nice, polite British gent who knows how to treat a lady instead, eh?