Here comes Halloween – and along with the usual array of clever, nay ingenious get ups – comes a smorgasbord of bad taste crap.
Ebola hazmat suit anyone? Charming blood-stained cheerleader outfit for your nine-year-old perhaps?
Or will you be opting for the triple-breasted hoaxer Jasmine Tridevil?
Please don’t wear these. They’re horrible.
Inappropriate Halloween Costumes
'Ebola containment suits' (01 of09)
The $79.99 costume comes with a face shield, breathing mask, safety goggles and blue latex gloves, but boots are not included. The costume's web page promises buyers calls the Ebola outfit the most "viral" costume of the year and say the wearer is "sure to be prepared if any outbreak happens." (credit:Brandsonsale.com)
Blood-stained cheerleader(02 of09)
These charming blood-stained cheerleader outfits are available for 9-16 year olds and cost just £14 from Asda. (credit:Asda )
Jimmy Savile Zombie costume(03 of09)
Mercifully, this abomination has since been pulled from Amazon. At the time the Jimmy Savile 'Zombie' costume (because Savile himself wasn't terrifying enough?!) was a snip at just £14.99.
Jasmine Tridevil triple-breasted costume. (04 of09)
Golly Doll costume(05 of09)
'Mental patient'(06 of09)
'Psycho ward patient'(07 of09)
Boston Bombing victim costume(08 of09)
Because dressing like a bloodied runner in a tragedy which claimed three lives is funny, right? Alicia Ann Lynch found out the hard way it's not, with a severe online backlash leading to her issuing a heartfelt apology.
Slenderman (09 of09)
SEE ALSO: This Halloween Chainsaw Prank Is Probably The Most Hysterically Horrendous Thing You Will Ever See
Halloween History
Halloween originated from the Celtic festival of Samhain. (01 of09)
Over 2,000 years ago, the Celts celebrated the end of the harvest season on Oct. 31. They believed that on that night, ghosts of the dead returned to earth to wreak havoc on their crops and possess the living.
What did they do to ward off the ghosts? Dress up in animal heads and skins to entertain and confuse the spirits, naturally. (credit:Giphy)
What did they do to ward off the ghosts? Dress up in animal heads and skins to entertain and confuse the spirits, naturally. (credit:Giphy)
We can thank the Romans for that whole bobbing for apples thing.(02 of09)
Put your whole face in a bucket of water, they said. It'll be fun, they said. THANKS FOR NOTHING, ROMANS.
Around 43 A.D., once the Romans had conquered Celtic territory, they took the festival of Samhain and combined it with two of their own festivals: Feralia, a day to remember the dead, and the festival of Pomona, a day to celebrate the goddess whose symbol was the apple. Fast forward a few thousand years, and now we're bobbing for those damn things. (credit:Giphy)
Around 43 A.D., once the Romans had conquered Celtic territory, they took the festival of Samhain and combined it with two of their own festivals: Feralia, a day to remember the dead, and the festival of Pomona, a day to celebrate the goddess whose symbol was the apple. Fast forward a few thousand years, and now we're bobbing for those damn things. (credit:Giphy)
The word Halloween comes from the Middle English word "Alholowmesse."(03 of09)
By 609 A.D., the Catholics wanted in on the spooky action. Pope Boniface created All Martyrs Day, which would eventually evolve to become All Saints' Day, celebrated on Nov. 1. Catholics incorporated many elements of the Celtic holiday of Samhain by celebrating with costumes and bonfires ( a thinly veiled attempt to convert the Celtic pagans to Christianity).
The new, fusion holiday was also known as All-hallows (derived from Alholowmeesse, or All Saints' Day in Middle English), therefore the night before became All-hallows Eve, and then Halloween. (credit:Giphy)
The new, fusion holiday was also known as All-hallows (derived from Alholowmeesse, or All Saints' Day in Middle English), therefore the night before became All-hallows Eve, and then Halloween. (credit:Giphy)
Americans weren't too jazzed about Halloween... at first.(04 of09)
In the early colonies, rigid Protestant beliefs precluded the holiday from taking hold. BUZZ KILL.
But when the Irish Potato Famine sent an influx of Irish (Catholic) immigrants to the America, Halloween gained some traction. In the late 1800s, Americans began dressing up, going door to door for treats, and celebrating within their communities. (credit:Giphy)
But when the Irish Potato Famine sent an influx of Irish (Catholic) immigrants to the America, Halloween gained some traction. In the late 1800s, Americans began dressing up, going door to door for treats, and celebrating within their communities. (credit:Giphy)
Eventually, we came around; Halloween is now America's 2nd largest commercial holiday. (05 of09)
Halloween's popularity went through ebbs and flows in the U-S-of-A. The holiday lost popularity in the '20s and '30s when young hooligans started using Halloween as an excuse to commit vandalism. By the 1950s, town leaders curbed vandalism and focused celebrations on school-aged children. Trick-or-treating's popularity grew and helped make the holiday second only to Christmas, commercially. (credit:Giphy)
Just how commercial you ask? Americans spend a cool $6 billion each year on Halloween.(06 of09)
Approximately $4 billion is spent annually on costumes, decorations and parties. Candy consumption alone makes up $2 billion. The candy industry makes a quarter of the year's revenue during Halloween alone. (credit:Imgur)
The astronomical amount of money spent on candy is no fluke.(07 of09)
Not by a long shot. In 1985, the Senate held hearings on daylight saving time. Candy makers allegedly placed candy pumpkins on the seat of each senator as an incentive to vote to extend daylight saving time into November. Why? So candy-grubbin' kiddies would spend one more hour trick-or-treating, forcing their neighbors to buy more candy to fill the baskets. (credit:Giphy)
The original jack-o'-lanters were made from turnips, beets, and potatoes.(08 of09)
The ubiquitous decoration comes from a centuries-old Irish myth about a man named Stingy Jack. Jack managed to royally piss off the Devil during his time on Earth, so the Devil wouldn't let him into hell after his death. Because the trickster was also banned from heaven, Stingy Jack has been wandering the Earth with only a light in a hollowed-out turnip ever since.
The Scots and the Irish paid tribute to Jack by recreating his lantern with potatoes, turnips and beets on Halloween. When immigrants brought the tradition to the United States, they used the native pumpkin for their holiday carvings. (credit:Giphy)
The Scots and the Irish paid tribute to Jack by recreating his lantern with potatoes, turnips and beets on Halloween. When immigrants brought the tradition to the United States, they used the native pumpkin for their holiday carvings. (credit:Giphy)
A Halloween full moon is even more rare than a white Christmas. (09 of09)
Since 1925, there have only been five full moons on Halloween (1925, 1944, 1955, 1974, 2001). You'll have to wait until 2020 to see the next one. (credit:Giphy)
The Most Inappropriate Halloween Costumes Of All Time (CLONED)
"Sexy" Burt & Ernie Costumes(01 of69)
On second thought, maybe they should cut funding to PBS. (credit:Yandy)
"Ring Toss" Costume(02 of69)
The hat that says "Winner gets a free ride" is pretty much the worst. (credit:BuyCostumes)
The Nip Slip(03 of69)
Is it still a "slip" if you do it on purpose? (credit:Camp Blood)
Condom Dispenser(04 of69)
At least he's promoting safe sex. (credit:Scare Pros)
Female Inflatable Doll(05 of69)
Yeah... This could get awkward. (credit:BuyCostumes)
Walking Sex(06 of69)
Now you can make people uncomfortable all night long. (credit:Brands On Sale)
"Anna Rexia" Costume(07 of69)
Because eating disorders are meant to be portrayed as sexy and hilarious, right?
Just A Penis(08 of69)
Word to the wise: make sure you take your penis costume for a trial run at the local library before hitting the sidewalk. (credit:via Regretsy)
Giant Boob(09 of69)
At least he knows what he is. (credit:Spirit Halloween)
Google Boobs(10 of69)
Feeling lucky? (credit:Costume Fail)
Middle Finger(11 of69)
Facial expression not included. (credit:Amazon.com)
"Anita Sedative" Costume(12 of69)
When you're wearing a sexy costume to a Halloween party, it's probably a good idea to stay away from sedatives and not bring your own restraints. (credit:Yandy.com)
"Happy Morning" Costume(13 of69)
It's not surprising that this one's on clearance for $7.99.
Pussy Magnet(14 of69)
We sort of feel like this guy wasn't looking for cats. (credit:Prank Place)
Holy Sh*t(15 of69)
Don't worry, there are more dirty puns where that came from. (credit:via Buy Costumes)
Free Mammograms(16 of69)
As long as there's no copay. (credit:via Asshole Verdict)
Mangina(17 of69)
If you wear this, it's the closest you'll come to seeing one that night.
Naked Grandmother(18 of69)
Why is the blacked-out tooth part of it? (credit:Zoogster Costumes)
"The Shocker" Costume(19 of69)
Make sure you include the hand gestures so you get the point across that you're a complete douche.
Tampax(20 of69)
Ladies? (credit:via Funny Junk)
Heartbreak Clown Thong(21 of69)
Dressing up as a heartbroken clown has never been ... sexier? (credit:via Regretsy)
Sexy American Indian(22 of69)
Pocahantas didn't even dress this sexy. (credit:Buy.com)
"Dept. Of Erections" Costume(23 of69)
For a con, he looks pretty pleased with himself.
"Beastiality" Costume(24 of69)
No more beer for this guy.
Poop(25 of69)
Looking like sh*t has never been so cute. (credit:via Etsy)
Banana Flasher(26 of69)
Of all the costumes that scream "I have a penis!" this has got to be the most frightening. (credit:Via Halloween 31)
"Droopers" Costume(27 of69)
Would you take a shot with this guy?
"Sperm Man" Costume(28 of69)
We don't even want to know what his superpowers are.
The 69(29 of69)
For those mischief-makers who enjoy holding plastic props to their bodies all night long. (credit:via Reddit))
A Knight To Remember(30 of69)
EEEEWWWWWW.
???(31 of69)
Just in case you wanted to dress up as "WTF" this Halloween. (credit:Unionversity.com)
The "Biggest Show On Earth"(32 of69)
Nothing says class like wearing a circus tent on your crotch.(Thanks for the tip, Karen!)
"Country Lovin"(33 of69)
The commercial version is so much more disturbing than the homemade version. (credit:Halloween 31)
Used Pad Man(34 of69)
Steady blood flow, meet steady alcohol flow. (credit:via Reddit)
Trash Can Baby(35 of69)
He has low self-esteem. (credit:via WTFCostumes)
Birthing Woman(36 of69)
Now your roommates know why you've been practicing your birth face in the mirror for so long. (credit:via Multiply)
Franzia(37 of69)
Wine in a box continues its tradition of being the least romantic thing ever. (credit:via eBaum's World)
Hung Like A Horse(38 of69)
Real subtle. (credit:Zoogster Costumes)
Vibrator(39 of69)
Dild'oh! (credit:Zoogster Costumes)
Toilet Time(40 of69)
These guys must really, really love each other. (credit:via Virgin Media)
Penis Man(41 of69)
In case anyone was wondering why Spencer's Gifts was sold out of mock penises this year. (credit:via The Colonial Footsoldier)
Sexy Etch-A-Sketch(42 of69)
We feel like this is going to end in some shaking accidents later in the night. (credit:Yandy)
The Human Centipede(43 of69)
Halloween couldn't be complete this year without a good old-fashioned Human Centipede costume. (credit:via Fazy Luckers)
Vagina Dentata(44 of69)
A feminist twist on the ubiquitous vagina-head costume worn by frat boys everywhere. (credit:via Regretsy)
Unkempt Lifeguard?(45 of69)
WHY? (credit:My Cheap Costume)
"Zombie Fetus" Costume(46 of69)
When you decide to pull off an extremely creepy costume, it's best to let your attitude match it. Yeah, it's a dead baby but she's cool with it.
Beer Dispensing Boobs(47 of69)
Let's see the St. Pauly Girl do this. (credit:Moon Costumes)
"Rub Me" Genie(48 of69)
More like Alad-don't. (credit:My Cheap Costume)
Hitler?!(49 of69)
We've seen homemade Hitler costumes before (which are also ridiculous) but this commercial version just blows us away. (credit:Daily Hitler)
Snake Charmer(50 of69)
Sometimes, knocking over every beer in front of you is a necessary sacrifice for the perfect sexual innuendo costume. (credit:via Amazon)
Furries??(51 of69)
We're not quite sure what these are...but we have a feeling they're NSFW. (credit:via Picture Is Unrelated)
Breathalyzer Test(52 of69)
It's getting hard to imagine a non-penis-related costume at this point. (credit:vVery Demotivational)
Nuts And Bolts(53 of69)
She's right to throw her hands up like that. (credit:Blogorelli)
Ball Pit(54 of69)
Hopefully he won't find any used band-aids in there. (credit:Izismile)
Toilet Paper(55 of69)
This one will be useful for all the TPing later. (credit:Make Zine)
"Wet T-Shirt" Costume(56 of69)
Is it more degrading to wear this ridiculous shirt with boobs attached, or to just wear a wet T-shirt and risk getting on "Girls Gone Wild?"
"Sexy" Cookie Monster?(57 of69)
There are some things that just should never be made into a "sexy" Halloween costume. Cookie Monster is definitely one of them. (credit:Via Best Week Ever)
BP Oil Spill(58 of69)
Maybe they're actually dressing up as this Onion article: "It's Nice We Can Finally Look Back On That Whole Oil Spill And Laugh." (credit:Funny Junk)
Sexy "Nemo" Costume(59 of69)
Dreams really do come true! (credit:Yandy.com)
Paralyzed Superman(60 of69)
This will forever be too soon. (credit:Costume Fail)
"Rasta Man" Costumes(61 of69)
We wonder how many white frat boys will put on this cartoonish representation of a Rasta? At least the squishy headpiece will soften the blows they will undoubtedly receive.
Sexy Unicorns(62 of69)
Thanks for ruining unicorns for everyone.
Chastity Belt & Key(63 of69)
Unlock the key to her ... stomach vagina? (credit:via The Colonial Footsoldier)
"Sexy" Monopoly(64 of69)
Thanks for ruining childhood game night.
Petting Zoo(65 of69)
For when you want to make everyone think about touching your junk AND bestiality for the entire night. (credit:Moon Costumes)
"Down For The Count"(66 of69)
You know a costume is bad when you have to repeat a pun just for anyone to get it.(Thanks for the tip, Jay!)
Jane Doe DOA (67 of69)
This description speaks for itself (full of typos):"Although she doesnt have much of a personality, she is still drop dead gorgeous in this body bag dress, Im sure you have the personality and in this you will be gorgeous. Stretch satin mini dress with hood and a two way zipper front which can zip all the way up the hood, this is sleeveless and has a vest style finish at the back. One breast has an outline of a body printed on to it an PROPERTY OF THE CORONER. Pack includes Coroners name tag fitted to a choker Jane Doe and matching fingerless gloves. (3 piece set). Fabrics are listed as 95% polyester and 5% spandex. and other accessories are available separately."(Thanks, Belinda!)
Spank His Monkey(68 of69)
Just 25 cents?
"Sexy" Brian From "Family Guy"(69 of69)
OK, now we're just confused.