Myth: You Must Orgasm To Be Satisfied(01 of24)
Open Image ModalMyth: Men Are Always In The Mood(02 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "Men are not sex machines in perpetual motion just waiting for their next opportunity to engage and explode," Lee says. "A man’s sexual desire has a lot to do with his own sense of self-worth, his emotional state and his comfort with his partner." So if your partner is male, don't expect him to jump into bed whenever you want — and more importantly, don't take it personally either.
Myth: No One Wants To Be Caught Cheating(03 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: According to Lee, many people — and especially women — have affairs because they want to be caught. "They want the affair to call attention to the problems in the marriage, to be the catalyst that ends the marriage so that they can move on," she explains. And then there's the safety net aspect — sometimes people want to know they'll have a new relationship before they can leave an unhappy one.
Myth: Affairs Break Up Marriages(04 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: Affairs don't create problems, they call attention to them. "Affairs are what people do when they are unable, for whatever reason, to deal directly with the problems they are having with their partner," Lee says. And it provides the hurt person with an enemy. "When two people are having difficulties, an affair allows them to 'blame' the cheating partner or even the third party."
Myth: Sex Addiction Is All About Sex(05 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "Sex addiction is not so much about sex as it is about unresolved issues within the individual," Lee notes. "There are generally underlying issues of shame and lack of self-worth that fuel a need for outside affirmation." Continuing to shame the person for their problem could only exacerbate it, so instead, she recommends talking about it non-judgmentally and finding help for it together.
Myth: People Stop Having Sex As They Age(06 of24)
Open Image ModalMyth: People With Disabilities Don’t Have Sex Drives(07 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "Most people with physical disabilities still need to experience the joy of sexuality, even if they are not able to achieve orgasm," Lee explains. Even simple things like skin against skin, or giving your partner an orgasm, could give them pleasure. Lee does warn against the possibility of abuse and manipulation for those with developmental and cognitive disabilities, but they should also be able to express their sexuality in a safe space.
Myth: Men And Women Reach Their Sexual Peak At Different Ages(08 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: Men do reach their highest testosterone level around 18 and women reach their highest estrogen level in their late 20s, but there's a difference between that and a sexual peak, says Lee. "We are in our sexual prime when we feel the most comfortable having sex. This happens when we feel good about ourselves, our bodies and our relationship." Believing this stereotype can delay sexual peak by making men feeling pressured into accumulating a lot of sexual experience early and making women feel pressured into feeling they cannot express their sexuality when they are young.
Myth: People Stop Masturbating When They Are In A Relationship(09 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "Almost everyone masturbates, even when they have a sexual partner," Lee says. "Masturbation is the first sexual act most of us experience, and most of us continue the practice into adulthood and throughout our lives." Lee believes it's actual important to our sexual education, as masturbation helps us learn what feels good to us, and share that with our partner and make sex even better.
Myth: Needing A Vibrator Is A Sign Of Sexual Problems(10 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "A vibrator is the most common sex toy and many women need the direct, intense stimulation a vibrator provides in order to orgasm. That doesn’t mean anything is wrong with the woman or with her partner," Lee says. "Some women can orgasm without a vibrator but it takes a longer time and they prefer to reach their climax without feeling they need to put in so much effort." And as she reminds people, a vibrator can only do one thing. A partner is still needed for kissing, holding, fondling and expressing your desire.
Myth: Everyone Is A Sexual Being(11 of24)
Open Image ModalTruth: "This is a myth I've have perpetuated," admits Lee. "But we are learning that some people are asexual and that this is not an illness, a disorder or a deficit, but rather, a sexual orientation. They simply have no interest in sex and feel no sexual desire." Asexual people may still be romantically attracted to others.
(12 of24)
Open Image ModalAries: The Ram (March 21 to April 19)(13 of24)
Open Image ModalAries are considered strong-willed perfectionists who have high expectations for themselves and others. If sex is beginning to feel too planned and perfect for you or your Aries partner, try this exercise suggested by Marin: have each partner write down everything they’d be willing to try in the bedroom, including things they’ve done before and ones they haven’t. Put each activity on a separate slip of paper, throw all the slips into a jar, then pluck one out and do what it says. "This fun exercise will help you break out of your preconceived and preplanned notions of sex,” Marin says.
Taurus: The Bull (April 20 to May 20) (14 of24)
Open Image ModalJust like a real bull, Taurus lovers can be stubborn. "Let go of your stubbornness by allowing your partner be in complete charge during a sexual interaction,” Marin says for people who struggle with their stubborn nature. "Let them decide what you do and when you do it."
Gemini: The Twins (May 21 to June 20)(15 of24)
Open Image ModalCancer: The Crab (June 21 to July 22)(16 of24)
Open Image ModalMore like Cancer the crabby, sometimes this sign craves stability and is ruled by gut feelings. They can often be moody. The next time you or your Cancer partner is feeling blue, try some sexual healing. "The rush of hormones that accompanies sex and orgasm has been proven to improve people's moods,” Marin says. "The next time you're feeling in a funk, try some sexy therapy."
Leo: The Lion (July 23 to Aug. 22) (17 of24)
Open Image ModalThis bold sign loves the spotlight, but is also loving and generous. Leos can take advantage of their flare for the dramatic in the bedroom by trying out some role playing, Marin says. "You can elevate a simple doctor-patient fantasy to an entirely new level by really digging into your character.”
Virgo: The Virgin (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22)(18 of24)
Open Image ModalVirgos are focused and analytical, and tend to keep their emotions inward — sometimes tough qualities to have in a lover. But you can bring that mental focus into lovemaking, Marin says. "A fun way to incorporate your brain into your sex life is to play 'Hot and Cold' with your partner. Have them kiss all over your body, and tell them when they're getting 'warmer' and 'colder.'"
Libra: The Scales (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22)(19 of24)
Open Image ModalJustice holding the scales symbolizes Libra, a sign obsessed with balance and fairness. They focus more on the mental than the physical, and love to surround themselves with beautiful things. "If you're a visual person, try keeping the lights on during sex, or having daytime sex,” Marin notes. "So many people have sex in pitch darkness, which takes away the fun visual element."
Scorpio: The Scorpion (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21)(20 of24)
Open Image ModalScorpios feel things deeply, even if they can sometimes sting with their words. If you want to take advantage of that passionate and emotional mindset, Marin suggests missionary sex, which involves a lot of eye contact with your partner.
Sagittarius: The Centaur (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21)(21 of24)
Open Image ModalThese sharp, energetic people are always looking for reinvention and like to wander. Keep things exciting and interesting by bringing in new activities regularly. Enjoy some well-written erotica together, or visit a sex shop and each pick something to surprise the other with.
Capricorn: The Goat (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) (22 of24)
Open Image ModalGoats love to have a plan, and are great at putting an evening together. But Marin says they also keep their feelings close to the vest. Be patient when it comes to sharing fantasies, and give Caps the lead on researching something fun for you to try together.
Aquarius: The Water Bearer (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18)(23 of24)
Open Image ModalAquarians are known for being unorthodox and unconventional, which can translate to a lot of fun in the bedroom. "Play up your adventurous side and try exploring some kink,” Marin says. If it’s new to you, a blindfold is a fun way to start, and if you want to explore further, visit an adult store and look into your many options for spicing things up.
Pisces: The Fish (Feb. 19 by March 20)(24 of24)
Open Image ModalThis insightful, emotional sign is selfless to a fault, which can unfortunately translate into unmet needs in the bedroom. If your partner is a Pisces, take the time to find out what he or she really wants and put the focus on those needs. If you’re a Pisces, work to make your desires heard and met in the bedroom, even if it goes against your nature. You’ll be glad you did!